Dear God,
Thank you for allowing me to see another birthday. Please bless me with the ability to be patient in receiving what I want in life, and to stop worrying that I don't yet have it. If it's a case of you waiting for everything to happen for me this year, then I pray it does. Through your son Jesus Christ, amen.
Dear Anyone,
I just want to thank my wonderful friends and family for making my birthday so fun. Although I had to waste most of the day at work, my colleagues (eventually) decorated the area behind my desk, and bought me a big, lovely, sweet birthday cake, which I was able to share with my friends and cousins this evening at the bar we went to. I also received three items on my birthday wish list! I'm so happy! I also can't wait for Saturday, because we'll be dining Japanese style, and then partying the night away in the comfort of SP's boyfriend Joseph's family home. Can you say 'EXCITED??!!'
But wow.......32.... hmm...
Wednesday 30 December 2009
Wednesday 16 December 2009
Birthday Wish List 09
Dear Anyone,
With exactly two weeks to go until my birthday, I thought you may like a hand in deciding what present to get me... you know... in case it's really troubling you. So you can choose from:
The new iPod Nano - I want a purple one! It's beautiful.
Michael Jackson's 'This Is It' DVD - I don't know when it's out, but whenever it does come out, that would be great.
'Thriller Live' tickets - I've heard that this show is really good, and... well... obviously it's about Michael Jackson, so naturally I have to see it.
An FM radio stereo system - all I currently have is my Bose iPod dock, so I haven't listened to the radio for aaaaaages. No wonder I have no clue what any song is these days.
Look Magazine Subscription - this is currently the only magazine I buy on a weekly basis, so I might as well subscribe really. I like the fact that they have achieveable fashion (namely high street) brands as well as the obligatory designer labels.
*This post has been written in jest. I don't really expect presents, but I won't lie, it is nice to receive them.
Gone Fishing
Dear Anyone,
After some careful thought and consideration, and encouragement from my life coach, I decided to take a big step out of my comfort zone and join a dating website.......... and I've just come from a 'date' with a guy I met on there.
I joined the site a week and a half ago, and my friend Shar is very happy I have - she's been on there for about a year and she keeps coming back with stories of her various escapades, so I thought I'd give it a try. The guy I met, we'll call him Fisher, is quite cute, he's 20 days older than me, studying for his Masters degree, drives, doesn't live too far and he seems nice enough, but he's not from here (something I'm not used to) and he's pretty quiet like me, so there were gaps in conversation. Just as well the Nandos was delish. Also, he's laying the compliments on a little too strongly at an early stage. He'd already started calling me 'my angel' when we'd been chatting on instant messenger for about a day, and when we sat in his car to talk more after the meal, he actually adjusted his seat so that he could stare at me. I think he was under the impression that something romantic would happen, because he then tried to stroke strands of my hair. Tres uncomfortable. I know some will say that there's no pleasing some women, but it kinda makes me feel like telling him to "calm down son!"
My problem is that I like to get to know new guys gradually. Actually I shouldn't say 'problem', it's just how I am. As much as I would like to be in a relationship, I don't like feeling forced or like it's not flowing naturally. For me, this was more a chance for us to meet more than it was a date. Of course I'm not going to write him off, I'm just going to make sure that if anything is to develop here, it will be at my pace. He wants to see me again, but I told him that I don't know when I'll be free, and that is the truth. I'm off to Birmingham this weekend (hopefully there'll be plenty of stories derived from that trip) and it's Christmas next week, so I really don't know. Though I think I'd rather we chatted on the phone a bit more first. Hmm... we'll see...
After some careful thought and consideration, and encouragement from my life coach, I decided to take a big step out of my comfort zone and join a dating website.......... and I've just come from a 'date' with a guy I met on there.
I joined the site a week and a half ago, and my friend Shar is very happy I have - she's been on there for about a year and she keeps coming back with stories of her various escapades, so I thought I'd give it a try. The guy I met, we'll call him Fisher, is quite cute, he's 20 days older than me, studying for his Masters degree, drives, doesn't live too far and he seems nice enough, but he's not from here (something I'm not used to) and he's pretty quiet like me, so there were gaps in conversation. Just as well the Nandos was delish. Also, he's laying the compliments on a little too strongly at an early stage. He'd already started calling me 'my angel' when we'd been chatting on instant messenger for about a day, and when we sat in his car to talk more after the meal, he actually adjusted his seat so that he could stare at me. I think he was under the impression that something romantic would happen, because he then tried to stroke strands of my hair. Tres uncomfortable. I know some will say that there's no pleasing some women, but it kinda makes me feel like telling him to "calm down son!"
My problem is that I like to get to know new guys gradually. Actually I shouldn't say 'problem', it's just how I am. As much as I would like to be in a relationship, I don't like feeling forced or like it's not flowing naturally. For me, this was more a chance for us to meet more than it was a date. Of course I'm not going to write him off, I'm just going to make sure that if anything is to develop here, it will be at my pace. He wants to see me again, but I told him that I don't know when I'll be free, and that is the truth. I'm off to Birmingham this weekend (hopefully there'll be plenty of stories derived from that trip) and it's Christmas next week, so I really don't know. Though I think I'd rather we chatted on the phone a bit more first. Hmm... we'll see...
Sunday 6 December 2009
Back in 09
Dear Anyone,
Although we have not yet entered 2010, and it's a little early to be reciting my resolutions, I would just like to inform you of one I have made. I will be leaving all these Doing-Nothing-For-Me men back in 2009.
I have decided to leave the idea of Muscle here in 2009. Yes, he ticks most of the boxes on my list, and yes, I probably held a fraction of hope that one day maybe, just maybe, we might actually get together, but I've accepted that it more than likely won't happen. I came to this conclusion a couple of weeks ago when I called him just to catch up, since we hadn't spoken for a while. It was a Sunday afternoon and he said he was just chilling at home, but he kept yawning, and I think the thing that cemented it for me was the fact that he ended the conversation. They say that the one who made the call should be the one to end it, and if the other person does, then they are probably bored or don't want to speak to you. I'm not saying there was any type of malicious intent, but maybe I should just take a hint. So I will. We'll always be friends, because I think he's a great guy, but any sort of harboured hope I may hold will no longer remain.
As for Tod, the whole 'it is what it is' won't be any longer. It's really not worth it and I deserve 100% better. Entertaining him is compromising who I am and what I actually want. I know there are many girls who he spins the same lyrics to as he spins to me, so I just don't see why I should lower myself. Again with him I'll also remain friends, but nothing further.
The Body isn't even really worth mentioning. He calls or messages me probably when I cross his mind every few weeks, and aside from him being young, I feel he is someone who wants to be chased and expects a girl to come to him on his own time, and that doesn't work for me. He'll ask when I'm free, and he will want it to be at that momemt that he's contacted me, when I'm usually busy, but he won't make an effort to arrange a time and make it happen, which is annoying really. Hot boy, but I need a hot man.
So hopefully, together with your prayers and my strength, I will leave these people (as I've known them) here at the end of 2009, and begin the new decade with a new network and new opportunities and experiences.
Although we have not yet entered 2010, and it's a little early to be reciting my resolutions, I would just like to inform you of one I have made. I will be leaving all these Doing-Nothing-For-Me men back in 2009.
I have decided to leave the idea of Muscle here in 2009. Yes, he ticks most of the boxes on my list, and yes, I probably held a fraction of hope that one day maybe, just maybe, we might actually get together, but I've accepted that it more than likely won't happen. I came to this conclusion a couple of weeks ago when I called him just to catch up, since we hadn't spoken for a while. It was a Sunday afternoon and he said he was just chilling at home, but he kept yawning, and I think the thing that cemented it for me was the fact that he ended the conversation. They say that the one who made the call should be the one to end it, and if the other person does, then they are probably bored or don't want to speak to you. I'm not saying there was any type of malicious intent, but maybe I should just take a hint. So I will. We'll always be friends, because I think he's a great guy, but any sort of harboured hope I may hold will no longer remain.
As for Tod, the whole 'it is what it is' won't be any longer. It's really not worth it and I deserve 100% better. Entertaining him is compromising who I am and what I actually want. I know there are many girls who he spins the same lyrics to as he spins to me, so I just don't see why I should lower myself. Again with him I'll also remain friends, but nothing further.
The Body isn't even really worth mentioning. He calls or messages me probably when I cross his mind every few weeks, and aside from him being young, I feel he is someone who wants to be chased and expects a girl to come to him on his own time, and that doesn't work for me. He'll ask when I'm free, and he will want it to be at that momemt that he's contacted me, when I'm usually busy, but he won't make an effort to arrange a time and make it happen, which is annoying really. Hot boy, but I need a hot man.
So hopefully, together with your prayers and my strength, I will leave these people (as I've known them) here at the end of 2009, and begin the new decade with a new network and new opportunities and experiences.
Sunday 29 November 2009
Plus None?
Dear Anyone,
I have just come back from a wedding I attended all by myself. As in... no date, no mate, just me and people I had a good chance of not knowing. Would that not be considered a nightmare for some people?!
I was invited by the groom Aidan, who I went to University with. When I received the invitation I was quite impressed by its packaging. It was rolled in a golden coloured tube, with a nice golden ribbon tied around it. I read the details, and apart from the fact that it was all the way across London, I was baffled by the "(1)" written beside my name. Did this mean me plus one, or me alone? I sent Aidan a text asking just that, and his reply was: "Just you." Ok... never heard that one before.
I seriously SERIOUSLY debated whether or not to go, because I know myself. If it's just me invited, then it means trekking all the way in no car, and carrying my shoes, because I'm not hurting my feet in heels for anyone. But I'm so glad I decided to go - it was lovely!
I was at the table reserved for Uni friends, so I was with at least four others that I knew and haven't seen for years, but we were all joking around and reminiscing, and it was great. I didn't feel awkward at all. At one point one of the guys suggested that a few of us exchange seats, so that everyone mingles with each other, and it worked.
They say that there is always a chance that you could meet a potential new 'someone' at a wedding, and although this didn't really happen for me, I did get talking to one guy who I knew from Uni but we didn't speak back then. To be honest, he used to scare me a little, and I told him so today. Back then he just seemed aggressive, with his gold tooth and tattoos. He laughed when I told him, and one of the other guys said that I'm not the first to think that. But now that I've actually spoken to him, he's quite mellow and funny... and cute. I gave him my details to find me on Facebook (his suggestion), so we'll see.
Despite the typical wet English weather trying to dampen the mood, it has turned out to be a really nice day. It's lovely to see Aidan so happy, and his new wife seems like a lovely woman, judging by all the tributes that were made. Aidan reckons it will be my turn soon, and I appreciate his faith, but I'm saying nothing. It's made me think that I need to get my skates on though, 2011 isn't that far off...
I have just come back from a wedding I attended all by myself. As in... no date, no mate, just me and people I had a good chance of not knowing. Would that not be considered a nightmare for some people?!
I was invited by the groom Aidan, who I went to University with. When I received the invitation I was quite impressed by its packaging. It was rolled in a golden coloured tube, with a nice golden ribbon tied around it. I read the details, and apart from the fact that it was all the way across London, I was baffled by the "(1)" written beside my name. Did this mean me plus one, or me alone? I sent Aidan a text asking just that, and his reply was: "Just you." Ok... never heard that one before.
I seriously SERIOUSLY debated whether or not to go, because I know myself. If it's just me invited, then it means trekking all the way in no car, and carrying my shoes, because I'm not hurting my feet in heels for anyone. But I'm so glad I decided to go - it was lovely!
I was at the table reserved for Uni friends, so I was with at least four others that I knew and haven't seen for years, but we were all joking around and reminiscing, and it was great. I didn't feel awkward at all. At one point one of the guys suggested that a few of us exchange seats, so that everyone mingles with each other, and it worked.
They say that there is always a chance that you could meet a potential new 'someone' at a wedding, and although this didn't really happen for me, I did get talking to one guy who I knew from Uni but we didn't speak back then. To be honest, he used to scare me a little, and I told him so today. Back then he just seemed aggressive, with his gold tooth and tattoos. He laughed when I told him, and one of the other guys said that I'm not the first to think that. But now that I've actually spoken to him, he's quite mellow and funny... and cute. I gave him my details to find me on Facebook (his suggestion), so we'll see.
Despite the typical wet English weather trying to dampen the mood, it has turned out to be a really nice day. It's lovely to see Aidan so happy, and his new wife seems like a lovely woman, judging by all the tributes that were made. Aidan reckons it will be my turn soon, and I appreciate his faith, but I'm saying nothing. It's made me think that I need to get my skates on though, 2011 isn't that far off...
Wednesday 21 October 2009
Starved
Dear Anyone,
I've been thinking about Muscle and Tod quite a bit in the past week. I haven't actually seen or spoken to Tod for a while, and Muscle and I had a conversation by text a few days ago, which is what got me thinking about him again. I think it's because I'm starved of affection right now. I'm bored. I'd like some kind of distraction at least until my future husband decides to show himself. Or better still - I'd like him to make an appearance now, please.
I think I'm just going through one of those lonely phases again. Right now I am actually, completely and utterly single, as in, if I meet someone new right now I won't have to consider anyone else's feelings or wonder how I'd break the news to someone else. As single as the day I was born - that's me.
I do have work and other things going on, that other people successfully use to occupy their minds, but that doesn't really work for me. Well it's not working right now anyway. I'm not going to bore you with what I want exactly, because I'm sure with the number of times I have been on and on about it, you could recite it to me word-perfect.
I just need a new routine, new scenery, new opportunities, and most of all, as LL Cool J put it - I NEED LOVE!!
I've been thinking about Muscle and Tod quite a bit in the past week. I haven't actually seen or spoken to Tod for a while, and Muscle and I had a conversation by text a few days ago, which is what got me thinking about him again. I think it's because I'm starved of affection right now. I'm bored. I'd like some kind of distraction at least until my future husband decides to show himself. Or better still - I'd like him to make an appearance now, please.
I think I'm just going through one of those lonely phases again. Right now I am actually, completely and utterly single, as in, if I meet someone new right now I won't have to consider anyone else's feelings or wonder how I'd break the news to someone else. As single as the day I was born - that's me.
I do have work and other things going on, that other people successfully use to occupy their minds, but that doesn't really work for me. Well it's not working right now anyway. I'm not going to bore you with what I want exactly, because I'm sure with the number of times I have been on and on about it, you could recite it to me word-perfect.
I just need a new routine, new scenery, new opportunities, and most of all, as LL Cool J put it - I NEED LOVE!!
Wednesday 30 September 2009
Can't Live With 'Em, Can't Live Without 'Em
Dear Anyone,
I'm currently going through one of those phases where my family is getting on my nerves, and it feels a bit too crowded at home. My mum just keeps moaning, and it makes me not want to be around. She says I have an answer for everything, and maybe I do, but I told her that I'm not going to stay quiet and let her think she's right, when I don't think she is. Was that rude?
My youngest brother is taking the utmost PISS in paying back money he owes me. I've had to confiscate the new phone he ordered, which he's not getting it back until I get my money, and he knows not to ask me for it either. It's so annoying, I give him an inch and he takes a mile, as they say.
I really need my own place, my room is just not enough. That way relationships won't be so strained and people won't get irritable. But of course that's where the issue of money comes in.... Sigh...
I'm currently going through one of those phases where my family is getting on my nerves, and it feels a bit too crowded at home. My mum just keeps moaning, and it makes me not want to be around. She says I have an answer for everything, and maybe I do, but I told her that I'm not going to stay quiet and let her think she's right, when I don't think she is. Was that rude?
My youngest brother is taking the utmost PISS in paying back money he owes me. I've had to confiscate the new phone he ordered, which he's not getting it back until I get my money, and he knows not to ask me for it either. It's so annoying, I give him an inch and he takes a mile, as they say.
I really need my own place, my room is just not enough. That way relationships won't be so strained and people won't get irritable. But of course that's where the issue of money comes in.... Sigh...
Thursday 20 August 2009
Declaration!
Dear Anyone,
I am putting it out there to let it be known by all: On this day in exactly two years time... I SHALL BE GETTING MARRIED.
To whom - I don't know. Where - I have no clue. But I do know when:
Saturday on the 20th day of August in the year 2011.
So please write it in your diaries and start planning your outfits. Ladies - no black please.
Thank you.
I am putting it out there to let it be known by all: On this day in exactly two years time... I SHALL BE GETTING MARRIED.
To whom - I don't know. Where - I have no clue. But I do know when:
Saturday on the 20th day of August in the year 2011.
So please write it in your diaries and start planning your outfits. Ladies - no black please.
Thank you.
Friday 14 August 2009
Let's Have A Good Ole Catch Up
Dear Anyone,
I've realised that I have become a bit slack in updating you on what has been going on, so instead of writing a number of different posts, I'm going to update you in one. Go and make your cuppa and get comfy. Let's see...
I last told you about meeting The Body at the beginning of July. Well it's been a bit of a let down to be honest. We met up very briefly at the train station in our area that following Friday, when he was on his way to his brother's house for the night. It was literally for about five minutes. We'd been speaking on the phone throughout the week and I think we were both just very curious about what the other looked like close up! I definitely wasn't disappointed. We then met up again on the Sunday afternoon (which we joked about being our anniversary), but we only went for a drive, then parked up outside the block he lives in, because he admitted that he was presently broke and didn't really have the funds to go out and have a proper date. But it gave us the opportunity to talk and get to know each other a bit more. I thought he seemed like a cool guy, a bit quiet, but not in a way that made it awkward. To be honest though, I kind of got the hint that we might not be looking for the same thing when we'd spoken on the phone earlier and he told me he was horny, and tried to ask me personal questions about sex. I wasn't really feeling that, but I still decided to remain open-minded, you know, trying not to be the Agenda Girl that I identified myself as. We met up again the following Friday and went for something to eat, then back to his place, where we watched a bit of telly and chilled. Yes, there was a little kissing and touching, but nothing much. We fell asleep and woke up at about 3am, and he paid for my cab home. I haven't seen him since then though. There have been one or two text and phone conversations, but nothing to report. He reckons he's busy job hunting (he told me he'd quit his job, because it wasn't for him, but I don't know how convinced I am about that) and I know he goes to the gym every day. I'm not really as bothered as I probably should or thought I would be. As gorgeous as he is, I don't think that spark was there. All this happened about a month ago, and we haven't really spoken much since, so I might give him a call and see how he is. Won't hurt, will it?
I've just come back from a holiday in New York and I want to go back! I went with my cousins Ursula and Wonder for 10 days, and we rented a condo in Harlem. It was lovely - one of those that makes you wish you had your own place... well me anyway. The location was extremely convenient, because we had a main road at either end of ours, so we had easy access to all kinds of shops, plus it was only two blocks from the nearest subway. I have to say though, I don't find it as cheap over there as it used to be. I know that the GBP is not as strong against the US Dollar as usual, but I think this recession has made them increase their prices generally. Such is life I guess. It was Ursula's birthday three days after we arrived, so we had a little get-together with the few people we know over there - Ursula's two cousins, and her friend from London, Wonder's "friend" who moved there a few months ago, and his friend (who they tried to set me up with, but I wasn't even slightly interested), and another of her friends who she met on Myspace (he's a funny young man though). It was a nice day, except Wonder let her "friend" upset her, and that resulted in her being a bit of an emotional wreck for the rest of the evening. Ursula had fun and got drunk, so that was the main thing. In fact, I don't think I'll even discuss the mass alcohol consumption during the course of the ten days... All I will say is that my liver is probably going to punish me soon. We also took a trip to a huge shopping mall in New Jersey, called Jersey Gardens (courtesy of my friend Minnie), and visited Brooklyn. Ursula's aunt lives in Brooklyn and she was nice enough to cook plenty of food to last us the entire trip, so we in turn went to visit her (where she cooked for us again!) and give her a 'thank you' gift. Wonder didn't come with us that day though, because she allowed that piss-taking "friend" of hers to do just that - take the piss. He knew we'd had plans to go to Brooklyn that day, so he called in the morning and said he wanted to come with us. We had breakfast, showered, dressed, chilled, and he still hadn't turned up, so we decided that we needed to leave. Wonder called him to find out where he was, and he was still at home. I kept telling her to tell him to meet us there, but instead she asked him if she should wait for him. She flopped. Ursula and I went ahead, and let's just say we didn't see Wonder and her man until we had headed back to Times Sq. I couldn't really talk to her for a bit, because it pissed me off that she allowed this guy to mess up our plans, and she claimed to be annoyed at him, but she was still acting all lovey-dovey with him. I think this trip made me realise that Wonder and I are two different holiday types. I like to make the most of the trip and opportunities that arise, and she......... doesn't. Simples. But overall we enjoyed it, and made some new friends, so that's all good. And now I'm back to researching how to get some work over there for about a year. I'll let you know how that goes.
Hmm... what else? I still speak to Muscle every so often, usually by text. He's still hot, but why would that change? I saw him just before I went to NYC, when we met up after work for me to take my Scrabble board game back from him (I'd been to his place earlier this year and we played it, and naturally I won). He's cool though, just very busy it seems.
Tod is still Tod. Still undeserving, but I don't intend to marry him, so it still is what it is. I saw him when we got back from NYC, but before then the last time I saw him was in February I think. I don't have the time or energy to be dealing with baby-mama drama - not even slightly interested in it. It's one of those situations where he doesn't know what he wants, but he doesn't want me to not be there. I'm under no illusion about him and other women, as much as he tries to tell me there are none, I'm constantly hearing things to the contrary. It's not like I'm sitting here waiting for him to be ready for me, so he can do what he wants. I'm still (just about) keeping hope alive that I'll find someone to come with what I'm looking for, and I'm still searching and trying to be open minded, so one day... We won't go into the fact that I'm nearly 32 and banking on a six-month whirlwind romance, otherwise we'll be here forever.
In terms of my job... well I'm still at this place, but also still on my grind. Let's not talk about the day job, because I'm trying to be more positive in the things I focus on. So with the writing, I'm currently doing a couple of things: writing for a new UK men's magazine called Candy Mag. It is image heavy, but they have a few articles to hopefully engage females also. The models are semi-glamour models, so there is no full nudity, just implied, and though it is unpaid for now, it is something I don't mind doing because I do need to build my portfolio. I have also written biographies for a couple of models, to be used as a pitch to potential clients. In fact, let me name them now, so that when they become Supermodels, you'll know that I had a hand in it! Natalie Suliman and Sanya Hughes. Natalie has already been receiving press interest, as she is the owner of the famous pair of breasts used for Marks & Spencer's lingerie ad. Their manager also wants me to write a biog for himself and mini ones for his staff to go on their website and Wikipedia, which is great, because it's extra money in my pocket!!
So that's about it really, and new and I'll let you know. And I promise to do better with my updates, because my slackness isn't fair on the rest of you....
I've realised that I have become a bit slack in updating you on what has been going on, so instead of writing a number of different posts, I'm going to update you in one. Go and make your cuppa and get comfy. Let's see...
I last told you about meeting The Body at the beginning of July. Well it's been a bit of a let down to be honest. We met up very briefly at the train station in our area that following Friday, when he was on his way to his brother's house for the night. It was literally for about five minutes. We'd been speaking on the phone throughout the week and I think we were both just very curious about what the other looked like close up! I definitely wasn't disappointed. We then met up again on the Sunday afternoon (which we joked about being our anniversary), but we only went for a drive, then parked up outside the block he lives in, because he admitted that he was presently broke and didn't really have the funds to go out and have a proper date. But it gave us the opportunity to talk and get to know each other a bit more. I thought he seemed like a cool guy, a bit quiet, but not in a way that made it awkward. To be honest though, I kind of got the hint that we might not be looking for the same thing when we'd spoken on the phone earlier and he told me he was horny, and tried to ask me personal questions about sex. I wasn't really feeling that, but I still decided to remain open-minded, you know, trying not to be the Agenda Girl that I identified myself as. We met up again the following Friday and went for something to eat, then back to his place, where we watched a bit of telly and chilled. Yes, there was a little kissing and touching, but nothing much. We fell asleep and woke up at about 3am, and he paid for my cab home. I haven't seen him since then though. There have been one or two text and phone conversations, but nothing to report. He reckons he's busy job hunting (he told me he'd quit his job, because it wasn't for him, but I don't know how convinced I am about that) and I know he goes to the gym every day. I'm not really as bothered as I probably should or thought I would be. As gorgeous as he is, I don't think that spark was there. All this happened about a month ago, and we haven't really spoken much since, so I might give him a call and see how he is. Won't hurt, will it?
I've just come back from a holiday in New York and I want to go back! I went with my cousins Ursula and Wonder for 10 days, and we rented a condo in Harlem. It was lovely - one of those that makes you wish you had your own place... well me anyway. The location was extremely convenient, because we had a main road at either end of ours, so we had easy access to all kinds of shops, plus it was only two blocks from the nearest subway. I have to say though, I don't find it as cheap over there as it used to be. I know that the GBP is not as strong against the US Dollar as usual, but I think this recession has made them increase their prices generally. Such is life I guess. It was Ursula's birthday three days after we arrived, so we had a little get-together with the few people we know over there - Ursula's two cousins, and her friend from London, Wonder's "friend" who moved there a few months ago, and his friend (who they tried to set me up with, but I wasn't even slightly interested), and another of her friends who she met on Myspace (he's a funny young man though). It was a nice day, except Wonder let her "friend" upset her, and that resulted in her being a bit of an emotional wreck for the rest of the evening. Ursula had fun and got drunk, so that was the main thing. In fact, I don't think I'll even discuss the mass alcohol consumption during the course of the ten days... All I will say is that my liver is probably going to punish me soon. We also took a trip to a huge shopping mall in New Jersey, called Jersey Gardens (courtesy of my friend Minnie), and visited Brooklyn. Ursula's aunt lives in Brooklyn and she was nice enough to cook plenty of food to last us the entire trip, so we in turn went to visit her (where she cooked for us again!) and give her a 'thank you' gift. Wonder didn't come with us that day though, because she allowed that piss-taking "friend" of hers to do just that - take the piss. He knew we'd had plans to go to Brooklyn that day, so he called in the morning and said he wanted to come with us. We had breakfast, showered, dressed, chilled, and he still hadn't turned up, so we decided that we needed to leave. Wonder called him to find out where he was, and he was still at home. I kept telling her to tell him to meet us there, but instead she asked him if she should wait for him. She flopped. Ursula and I went ahead, and let's just say we didn't see Wonder and her man until we had headed back to Times Sq. I couldn't really talk to her for a bit, because it pissed me off that she allowed this guy to mess up our plans, and she claimed to be annoyed at him, but she was still acting all lovey-dovey with him. I think this trip made me realise that Wonder and I are two different holiday types. I like to make the most of the trip and opportunities that arise, and she......... doesn't. Simples. But overall we enjoyed it, and made some new friends, so that's all good. And now I'm back to researching how to get some work over there for about a year. I'll let you know how that goes.
Hmm... what else? I still speak to Muscle every so often, usually by text. He's still hot, but why would that change? I saw him just before I went to NYC, when we met up after work for me to take my Scrabble board game back from him (I'd been to his place earlier this year and we played it, and naturally I won). He's cool though, just very busy it seems.
Tod is still Tod. Still undeserving, but I don't intend to marry him, so it still is what it is. I saw him when we got back from NYC, but before then the last time I saw him was in February I think. I don't have the time or energy to be dealing with baby-mama drama - not even slightly interested in it. It's one of those situations where he doesn't know what he wants, but he doesn't want me to not be there. I'm under no illusion about him and other women, as much as he tries to tell me there are none, I'm constantly hearing things to the contrary. It's not like I'm sitting here waiting for him to be ready for me, so he can do what he wants. I'm still (just about) keeping hope alive that I'll find someone to come with what I'm looking for, and I'm still searching and trying to be open minded, so one day... We won't go into the fact that I'm nearly 32 and banking on a six-month whirlwind romance, otherwise we'll be here forever.
In terms of my job... well I'm still at this place, but also still on my grind. Let's not talk about the day job, because I'm trying to be more positive in the things I focus on. So with the writing, I'm currently doing a couple of things: writing for a new UK men's magazine called Candy Mag. It is image heavy, but they have a few articles to hopefully engage females also. The models are semi-glamour models, so there is no full nudity, just implied, and though it is unpaid for now, it is something I don't mind doing because I do need to build my portfolio. I have also written biographies for a couple of models, to be used as a pitch to potential clients. In fact, let me name them now, so that when they become Supermodels, you'll know that I had a hand in it! Natalie Suliman and Sanya Hughes. Natalie has already been receiving press interest, as she is the owner of the famous pair of breasts used for Marks & Spencer's lingerie ad. Their manager also wants me to write a biog for himself and mini ones for his staff to go on their website and Wikipedia, which is great, because it's extra money in my pocket!!
So that's about it really, and new and I'll let you know. And I promise to do better with my updates, because my slackness isn't fair on the rest of you....
Tuesday 7 July 2009
Still Got It!
Dear Anyone,
Two days ago I was standing at the bus stop on my way to meet SP to go to my niece's christening reception, while on the phone to my cousin Wonder. I looked across the road and spotted two extremely pretty guys walking, one of them was short and cute, and the other was very tall and had quite possibly the most beautiful physique I think I have seen in real life. He and Muscle would have to fight it out to win the title. It was that good. I tried to paint the picture of the beauty I was seeing to Wonder (which is a bit of a waste of time, because she's into skinny men), and the shorter one crossed the road to my bus stop, while The Body stayed at the stop opposite.
I - being a normal female - had to keep sneaking looks across the road as often as I could, because it would just be silly not to. Then I noticed him take his phone out, dial, and put it to his ear. I said to Wonder, "I'll bet you any money he's calling his friend," and I was so right. I couldn't hear what was said, because The Friend was at the other end of the bus stop, so I just continued to ogle when I could, but it was a little hard, because I am short-sighted so I couldn't tell if he was also looking at me or not, and naturally I wouldn't want to make it obvious.
Then I noticed my bus approaching in the distance (which was a damn shame!), and at the same time The Friend was walking over to where I was standing.
"Excuse me," he said to me. "My friend would like to talk to you."
"You'll have to ask him to cross over, because my bus is coming," I said.
Then he went back on his phone and was saying, "She wants you to come over... awww - you're too late now, the bus is here. You're so slow! What's wrong with you??"
At that same moment, The Body's bus arrived, and he got onto it, so The Friend continued to diss him about his lack of action. I decided to sit upstairs on the packed bus, and so did The Friend, but he was more at the front of the bus. Wonder was in my ear screaming "Oh my gosh, you have to give him your number! You have to! You can't waste this opportunity!" But I didn't know how, because to go up to him would be so obvious, and other people on the bus would probably hear our conversation - tres embarassing for me! Then it occurred to me... I have my business cards in my bag! I decided that if The Friend was getting off the bus before me, I would go up to him before he got off, but luckily I was getting off before him, so I took my card out of my bag, approached him and tapped him on his shoulder:
"Tell your friend that it's not too late, he can have my card."
Then I got off the bus. Wonder was screaming in my ear again, which wasn't fair because I wanted to scream too! It was not at all in my nature to be that forward, but I didn't care, because I might never see them again.
About 45 minutes later, when SP and I had just pulled up outside my cousin's house, I received a phone call from a number I didn't recognise. I answered, and it was The Body. He told me that he didn't want to approach me himself, because he could see I was on the phone and didn't know whether I was speaking to my boyfriend, so he asked his friend to, and was shocked that his friend did it, as he is extremely shy. He seems like quite a nice, confident guy, but my only grievance is that he is younger than me, but I won't let that get in the way of the possibility of getting to know him.
YOU KNOW I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED!
Two days ago I was standing at the bus stop on my way to meet SP to go to my niece's christening reception, while on the phone to my cousin Wonder. I looked across the road and spotted two extremely pretty guys walking, one of them was short and cute, and the other was very tall and had quite possibly the most beautiful physique I think I have seen in real life. He and Muscle would have to fight it out to win the title. It was that good. I tried to paint the picture of the beauty I was seeing to Wonder (which is a bit of a waste of time, because she's into skinny men), and the shorter one crossed the road to my bus stop, while The Body stayed at the stop opposite.
I - being a normal female - had to keep sneaking looks across the road as often as I could, because it would just be silly not to. Then I noticed him take his phone out, dial, and put it to his ear. I said to Wonder, "I'll bet you any money he's calling his friend," and I was so right. I couldn't hear what was said, because The Friend was at the other end of the bus stop, so I just continued to ogle when I could, but it was a little hard, because I am short-sighted so I couldn't tell if he was also looking at me or not, and naturally I wouldn't want to make it obvious.
Then I noticed my bus approaching in the distance (which was a damn shame!), and at the same time The Friend was walking over to where I was standing.
"Excuse me," he said to me. "My friend would like to talk to you."
"You'll have to ask him to cross over, because my bus is coming," I said.
Then he went back on his phone and was saying, "She wants you to come over... awww - you're too late now, the bus is here. You're so slow! What's wrong with you??"
At that same moment, The Body's bus arrived, and he got onto it, so The Friend continued to diss him about his lack of action. I decided to sit upstairs on the packed bus, and so did The Friend, but he was more at the front of the bus. Wonder was in my ear screaming "Oh my gosh, you have to give him your number! You have to! You can't waste this opportunity!" But I didn't know how, because to go up to him would be so obvious, and other people on the bus would probably hear our conversation - tres embarassing for me! Then it occurred to me... I have my business cards in my bag! I decided that if The Friend was getting off the bus before me, I would go up to him before he got off, but luckily I was getting off before him, so I took my card out of my bag, approached him and tapped him on his shoulder:
"Tell your friend that it's not too late, he can have my card."
Then I got off the bus. Wonder was screaming in my ear again, which wasn't fair because I wanted to scream too! It was not at all in my nature to be that forward, but I didn't care, because I might never see them again.
About 45 minutes later, when SP and I had just pulled up outside my cousin's house, I received a phone call from a number I didn't recognise. I answered, and it was The Body. He told me that he didn't want to approach me himself, because he could see I was on the phone and didn't know whether I was speaking to my boyfriend, so he asked his friend to, and was shocked that his friend did it, as he is extremely shy. He seems like quite a nice, confident guy, but my only grievance is that he is younger than me, but I won't let that get in the way of the possibility of getting to know him.
YOU KNOW I WILL KEEP YOU POSTED!
Friday 26 June 2009
Gone Too Soon
Like the loss of sunlight with the rising of the moon, gone too soon.
'Gone Too Soon' - Dangerous (1991)
Michael Jackson
Dear Anyone,
I am absolutely distraught at the events of yesterday. I know I don't even have to tell you what I'm talking about, because it's one of those "Where were you when...?" moments. The passing of a legend is worldwide knowledge. I feel sick. I actually threw up this morning while I was in the bathroom. It's too bloody soon. He wasn't meant to go yet. I know people say that legends always die young, but not yet. Not without warning. He wasn't even ill (that we knew of).
I received so many phone call and texts while the news was breaking. People asking me if I was okay - you'd think I was actually related to him. Whenever you hear of a celebrity dying it's always a shock, but this was the one I dreaded the most, and it has actually happened. I can't believe it.
I was in my bedroom chatting to my mum about her holiday in California, when SP called me asking if i was okay.
"Yeah I'm fine, why?"
"Haven't you seen the news?"
"No, why what's happened??"
I then quickly switched the TV over to SKY News and saw the breaking news. At the time it was unconfirmed, but I just started shaking in disbelief and my mum even had to hold me so I didn't fall. This was just after 10pm, and I didn't go to bed until nearly 3am. Of course I couldn't sleep a wink, and strangely enough I don't feel tired today. Just shocked. Now I have to prepare myself for the continuous tabloid coverage. Great.
RIP MJ.... hopefully now you're out of whatever pain it was that was troubling you..
'Gone Too Soon' - Dangerous (1991)
Michael Jackson
Dear Anyone,
I am absolutely distraught at the events of yesterday. I know I don't even have to tell you what I'm talking about, because it's one of those "Where were you when...?" moments. The passing of a legend is worldwide knowledge. I feel sick. I actually threw up this morning while I was in the bathroom. It's too bloody soon. He wasn't meant to go yet. I know people say that legends always die young, but not yet. Not without warning. He wasn't even ill (that we knew of).
I received so many phone call and texts while the news was breaking. People asking me if I was okay - you'd think I was actually related to him. Whenever you hear of a celebrity dying it's always a shock, but this was the one I dreaded the most, and it has actually happened. I can't believe it.
I was in my bedroom chatting to my mum about her holiday in California, when SP called me asking if i was okay.
"Yeah I'm fine, why?"
"Haven't you seen the news?"
"No, why what's happened??"
I then quickly switched the TV over to SKY News and saw the breaking news. At the time it was unconfirmed, but I just started shaking in disbelief and my mum even had to hold me so I didn't fall. This was just after 10pm, and I didn't go to bed until nearly 3am. Of course I couldn't sleep a wink, and strangely enough I don't feel tired today. Just shocked. Now I have to prepare myself for the continuous tabloid coverage. Great.
RIP MJ.... hopefully now you're out of whatever pain it was that was troubling you..
Friday 19 June 2009
Not A Celebrity, But Get Me Out Of Here!
Dear Anyone,
Try as I might, the passion I feel for my job seems to be growing and growing more and more each day, and I can't control it. This passion I am speaking of is the one known as Hate. Right now I hate my job. With a passion. It's making me take liberties and not care, which is unlike me. I get there late, knowing full well that the Powers That Be can check my log in time, but do I give a....? Nope. I'm blatantly on the internet when I'm not supposed to be, but do I give a....? Nope. Work gets in the way of life, especially if it's a job you don't actually want to be doing.
I know that in this current climate I should be grateful that I even have a job, when so many people are being made redundant, but that still doesn't change my feeling. You know it's serious when your desire to leave is stronger than the realisation that if you do you will have no money. Sometimes I feel like if I was to be made redundant, I wouldn't even be upset about it. All I would be thinking is, "Yaaaay, I don't have to come here tomorrow!" I even envy our temps when they are told that they will be finishing! That's terrible, isn't it?
On a more positive note, things are really picking up on the freelance writing front. I recently wrote a biography for a model who is destined for big things, and got paid for it. She is currently the owner of the breasts used to advertise Marks & Spencer's lingerie. Now her manager wants me to write biogs for himself and his team. All good with me!
I am also now a writer for a new men's magazine, which a friend of mine got me involved in. It's a magazine full of eye-candy, so it's not heavy on the editorial. It's quarterly and not paid for now, which is absolutely fine with me, because I really need to build my portfolio with recent work.
A couple of days ago I designed some business cards on a really good website that SP showed me, so that I can promote myself as a freelance writer a bit more when we go to networking events. SP also designed some for herself, as she is trying to secure more freelance marketing projects. We are bang on this!! She has recently become a 'victim' of this credit crunch, but don't feel sorry her - she is now free from a workplace she also hates. Too much of our lives are spent wasting away in unappreciative environments, and now is the time to start putting an end to it once and for all. WE SHALL OVERCOME!!!
*clears throat* Sorry, I got a little carried away....
Try as I might, the passion I feel for my job seems to be growing and growing more and more each day, and I can't control it. This passion I am speaking of is the one known as Hate. Right now I hate my job. With a passion. It's making me take liberties and not care, which is unlike me. I get there late, knowing full well that the Powers That Be can check my log in time, but do I give a....? Nope. I'm blatantly on the internet when I'm not supposed to be, but do I give a....? Nope. Work gets in the way of life, especially if it's a job you don't actually want to be doing.
I know that in this current climate I should be grateful that I even have a job, when so many people are being made redundant, but that still doesn't change my feeling. You know it's serious when your desire to leave is stronger than the realisation that if you do you will have no money. Sometimes I feel like if I was to be made redundant, I wouldn't even be upset about it. All I would be thinking is, "Yaaaay, I don't have to come here tomorrow!" I even envy our temps when they are told that they will be finishing! That's terrible, isn't it?
On a more positive note, things are really picking up on the freelance writing front. I recently wrote a biography for a model who is destined for big things, and got paid for it. She is currently the owner of the breasts used to advertise Marks & Spencer's lingerie. Now her manager wants me to write biogs for himself and his team. All good with me!
I am also now a writer for a new men's magazine, which a friend of mine got me involved in. It's a magazine full of eye-candy, so it's not heavy on the editorial. It's quarterly and not paid for now, which is absolutely fine with me, because I really need to build my portfolio with recent work.
A couple of days ago I designed some business cards on a really good website that SP showed me, so that I can promote myself as a freelance writer a bit more when we go to networking events. SP also designed some for herself, as she is trying to secure more freelance marketing projects. We are bang on this!! She has recently become a 'victim' of this credit crunch, but don't feel sorry her - she is now free from a workplace she also hates. Too much of our lives are spent wasting away in unappreciative environments, and now is the time to start putting an end to it once and for all. WE SHALL OVERCOME!!!
*clears throat* Sorry, I got a little carried away....
Friday 22 May 2009
Unpretty
Dear Anyone,
Hopefully when I do my hair I'll feel a little better. But that's not till next week!!!!!
(I proceed to wail like a baby...)
Wednesday 6 May 2009
Cyber-friends
Dear Anyone,
Last night I met up with an American friend I made on Myspace a couple of years ago, who is in London on a short break.................. and 'she' turned out to be a 42-year old, balding man, with the biggest and most disgusting pot-belly I have ever seen...
Joke!!!
Luckily for you I trust my instincts and I had absolutely no reason to doubt her, even though I had a couple of nay-sayers telling me otherwise. Her name is Minnie (or that's what we'll call her) and we seem to have a lot in common. Our parents come from the same country, we're in the same age group, and we're into most of the same things. And she's really cool! Her sister is here studying at university for one semester, so Minnie came to visit and they'll be heading back to the U.S together on Sunday.
The three of us met up in south London and went to a bar/restaurant, but none of us was hungry, so we just had a couple of drinks. And we chatted and chatted and chatted away like old friends. Of course the main topic of conversation was men, since we're all practically in the same boat, and we exchanged stories of recent and not so recent relationships. It's so funny how similar our experiences are. It was a very nice evening. It makes me feel optimistic about meeting new people amd making new friends.
I definitely plan on meeting up with her the next time I go to New York. It's about time we made some female friends in the U.S., instead of these excited guys who aren't really interested in showing you around their country.
So here's to new friends - cheeeers!
Luckily for you I trust my instincts and I had absolutely no reason to doubt her, even though I had a couple of nay-sayers telling me otherwise. Her name is Minnie (or that's what we'll call her) and we seem to have a lot in common. Our parents come from the same country, we're in the same age group, and we're into most of the same things. And she's really cool! Her sister is here studying at university for one semester, so Minnie came to visit and they'll be heading back to the U.S together on Sunday.
The three of us met up in south London and went to a bar/restaurant, but none of us was hungry, so we just had a couple of drinks. And we chatted and chatted and chatted away like old friends. Of course the main topic of conversation was men, since we're all practically in the same boat, and we exchanged stories of recent and not so recent relationships. It's so funny how similar our experiences are. It was a very nice evening. It makes me feel optimistic about meeting new people amd making new friends.
I definitely plan on meeting up with her the next time I go to New York. It's about time we made some female friends in the U.S., instead of these excited guys who aren't really interested in showing you around their country.
So here's to new friends - cheeeers!
Wednesday 15 April 2009
Loss
Dear Anyone,
The past few days have been quite hard in my family. My uncle - my dad's older brother - died on Easter Sunday, while on holiday in Ghana, and it was such a shock as none of us knew he was even ill.
He had a stroke seven years ago, and although there was nothing wrong with his mind, his body was paralysed on one side, so he'd been in a wheelchair ever since. But every time he goes to Ghana, he has treatment and responds so well to it, that the doctors are always hopeful that he'd walk again. I guess that's not going to happen now.
My cousin Diggy is absolutely devastated as you would imagine. She was basically a daddy's girl, she'd even tell you that herself, and she was looking forward to her parents returning next month. When I'd found out and managed to get in touch with her, she was completely incoherent through her wailing, but she calmed down a little later. My brothers and I went to see her on Sunday night, and I offered to stay with her (as she is in the house alone) but she said that she wanted to be by herself with her dad's blanket. However, she sent me a text early yesterday morning asking if I could come and stay the night, so of course I did, and I had already text my manager to tell her what had happened and that I wouldn't be at work.
I've come to work from Diggy's house today, and I'm quite tired, because her brother also stayed over and we didn't go to bed till quite late. But more than that I'm just worried for Diggy and for my dad. My dad lost his other brother to a stroke just over 23 years ago, and now his last surviving brother has gone. Their mum died a couple of years ago too. Now he's going to have the stress of arranging a funeral and being strong for my aunty and everyone else, and that makes me worry about his own health. Strokes are rife in our family, as is high blood pressure. If something happened to my dad.....well it doesn't bear thinking about. And the worst thing (well not the worst) is that just over a week ago Diggy and I were talking about one of our friends who has just lost her mum, and how we wouldn't know what to do if it happened to us. Now this.
I'm going to do my very best to be as supportive as I can. It's just a pity that work gets in the way of life, or I'd be able to give her more of my time.
Rest in peace Uncle. You've been able to escape that body. xx
The past few days have been quite hard in my family. My uncle - my dad's older brother - died on Easter Sunday, while on holiday in Ghana, and it was such a shock as none of us knew he was even ill.
He had a stroke seven years ago, and although there was nothing wrong with his mind, his body was paralysed on one side, so he'd been in a wheelchair ever since. But every time he goes to Ghana, he has treatment and responds so well to it, that the doctors are always hopeful that he'd walk again. I guess that's not going to happen now.
My cousin Diggy is absolutely devastated as you would imagine. She was basically a daddy's girl, she'd even tell you that herself, and she was looking forward to her parents returning next month. When I'd found out and managed to get in touch with her, she was completely incoherent through her wailing, but she calmed down a little later. My brothers and I went to see her on Sunday night, and I offered to stay with her (as she is in the house alone) but she said that she wanted to be by herself with her dad's blanket. However, she sent me a text early yesterday morning asking if I could come and stay the night, so of course I did, and I had already text my manager to tell her what had happened and that I wouldn't be at work.
I've come to work from Diggy's house today, and I'm quite tired, because her brother also stayed over and we didn't go to bed till quite late. But more than that I'm just worried for Diggy and for my dad. My dad lost his other brother to a stroke just over 23 years ago, and now his last surviving brother has gone. Their mum died a couple of years ago too. Now he's going to have the stress of arranging a funeral and being strong for my aunty and everyone else, and that makes me worry about his own health. Strokes are rife in our family, as is high blood pressure. If something happened to my dad.....well it doesn't bear thinking about. And the worst thing (well not the worst) is that just over a week ago Diggy and I were talking about one of our friends who has just lost her mum, and how we wouldn't know what to do if it happened to us. Now this.
I'm going to do my very best to be as supportive as I can. It's just a pity that work gets in the way of life, or I'd be able to give her more of my time.
Rest in peace Uncle. You've been able to escape that body. xx
Tuesday 7 April 2009
A Real Boyfriend
Dear Anyone,
One of my 'friends' on Facebook posted this as a note, and I really like it, so I thought I'd share it with you (if only everyone could see this and understand it):
When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her
When she ignores you
Give her your attention
When she pulls away
Pull her back
When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared
Protect her
When she steals your favorite hoodie
Let her keep it and sleep with it
When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up
When she says that she loves you
She really does more than you can understand
When she grabs at your hands
Hold her's and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you
Bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret
Keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes
Dont look away until she does
When she says it's over
She still wants you to be hers
Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything
When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
Treat her like she's all that matters to you
Stay up all night with her when she's sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it's stupid
Give her the world
Let her wear your clothes
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
Let her know she's important
Don't talk about other girls around her
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is:"Whose ass am I kicking baby?"
If only! Sweet though, isn't it? And it's not too much to ask, is it?! Just because it's from the woman's point of view, doesn't mean to say that we wouldn't offer the same in return. I can imagine there are guys out there that would read a list like this and think we women are demanding too much 'as usual,' but I know guys who already think this way of their partners, so i know it's possible, I just wonder if it'll be a reality for me...
I've realised that I haven't recently updated you with the situation on my love life..... that's because there is no situation. So in actual fact I have kept you completely up to speed by saying nothing!
I met up with Muscle a couple of times about two months ago and went to his place, which was nice, but it hasn't meant anything in the long run. I didn't write about it at the time, because I didn't want people asking me questions. But one of the books I'm currently reading (The Secret: Daily Teachings) has an entry which states that just because you meet someone who you think is right for you, it doesn't mean that they actually are, but you can find yourself forcing that belief and inadvertedly pushing away the one who is. Basically how can you dictate what the Universe has in store for you? I think that's what I had/have been doing with Muscle. As I have said before, he ticks almost all my boxes, so maybe I have just been blinding myself to whoever else could be out there for me. Don't worry, he hasn't shown himself as yet, but as soon as he does you'll be the second to know.
And as for Tod, well I don't think he's really speaking to me right now. Generally speak very often, and recently he's been going through some personal issues. I have been as supportive as I can be, but now that the issues seem to have been resolved (to him) he's decided that if someone tells him what he needs to hear and not what he wants to hear, then what they are saying is stupid. I happen to be one of those people, and because he didn't like what I'd asked him it seems he's not really intersted in speaking to me. Whatever. He's a user, and one day it will come back to bite him. I'm not even contemplating the thought of allowing myself to be upset, because it's simply not worth it.
So there you go. No joy, but I'm allowing myself to be more positive and sociable, and hopefully in the process something might come of it.
One of my 'friends' on Facebook posted this as a note, and I really like it, so I thought I'd share it with you (if only everyone could see this and understand it):
When she stares at your mouth
Kiss her
When she ignores you
Give her your attention
When she pulls away
Pull her back
When you see her at her worst
Tell her she's beautiful
When you see her start crying
Just hold her and don't say a word
When you see her walking
Sneak up and hug her waist from behind
When she's scared
Protect her
When she steals your favorite hoodie
Let her keep it and sleep with it
When she teases you
Tease her back and make her laugh
When she doesn't answer for a long time
Reassure her that everything is okay
When she looks at you with doubt
Back yourself up
When she says that she loves you
She really does more than you can understand
When she grabs at your hands
Hold her's and play with her fingers
When she bumps into you
Bump into her back and make her laugh
When she tells you a secret
Keep it safe and untold
When she looks at you in your eyes
Dont look away until she does
When she says it's over
She still wants you to be hers
Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything
When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
When she says she's ok don't believe it, talk with her because 10 yrs later she'll remember you
Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
Treat her like she's all that matters to you
Stay up all night with her when she's sick
Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it's stupid
Give her the world
Let her wear your clothes
When she's bored and sad, hang out with her
Let her know she's important
Don't talk about other girls around her
Kiss her in the pouring rain
When she runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is:"Whose ass am I kicking baby?"
If only! Sweet though, isn't it? And it's not too much to ask, is it?! Just because it's from the woman's point of view, doesn't mean to say that we wouldn't offer the same in return. I can imagine there are guys out there that would read a list like this and think we women are demanding too much 'as usual,' but I know guys who already think this way of their partners, so i know it's possible, I just wonder if it'll be a reality for me...
I've realised that I haven't recently updated you with the situation on my love life..... that's because there is no situation. So in actual fact I have kept you completely up to speed by saying nothing!
I met up with Muscle a couple of times about two months ago and went to his place, which was nice, but it hasn't meant anything in the long run. I didn't write about it at the time, because I didn't want people asking me questions. But one of the books I'm currently reading (The Secret: Daily Teachings) has an entry which states that just because you meet someone who you think is right for you, it doesn't mean that they actually are, but you can find yourself forcing that belief and inadvertedly pushing away the one who is. Basically how can you dictate what the Universe has in store for you? I think that's what I had/have been doing with Muscle. As I have said before, he ticks almost all my boxes, so maybe I have just been blinding myself to whoever else could be out there for me. Don't worry, he hasn't shown himself as yet, but as soon as he does you'll be the second to know.
And as for Tod, well I don't think he's really speaking to me right now. Generally speak very often, and recently he's been going through some personal issues. I have been as supportive as I can be, but now that the issues seem to have been resolved (to him) he's decided that if someone tells him what he needs to hear and not what he wants to hear, then what they are saying is stupid. I happen to be one of those people, and because he didn't like what I'd asked him it seems he's not really intersted in speaking to me. Whatever. He's a user, and one day it will come back to bite him. I'm not even contemplating the thought of allowing myself to be upset, because it's simply not worth it.
So there you go. No joy, but I'm allowing myself to be more positive and sociable, and hopefully in the process something might come of it.
Wednesday 18 March 2009
The Thriller At The O2
Dear Anyone,
I'm so excited!!!! SP called me at work today and told me that Joseph had managed to get tickets to Michael Jackson's concert at the O2 Arena in September!
I don't think you understand what this means to me, and how stressful it has been to try and obtain even just one ticket. After it was announced that he would be doing shows in London, I made sure I instantly signed up to receive special codes, both on the Michael Jackson website and O2 (as I am a customer) so that I could book pre-sale tickets when they were released at 7am on 11 March, before the general release on 13 March. I received my codes the day before, so at 6.50am on the 11th I was up and ready with my PC and my phone. I was also liaising with Joseph, because we had agreed that we would both try to get four tickets each, keep the tickets with the better seats, and sell the others.
I was trying and trying and trying and trying on the phone, and trying and trying and trying and trying on the websites, and all attempts were proving fruitless for me. Joseph managed to get a little further than me, in that he was on the website, but was being told that he had a 15 minute wait. Then he finally managed to get through, but the tickets he was offered were on Level 4 - The Nose Bleed Section. There's no way either of us were willing to pay £50-75 to 'listen' to the show, so he let them go. I've already briefly experienced the view from up there when we were originally given those useless seats at the New Kids On The Block concert. No way, Jose. As much as I love the King of Pop, I don't have the money to waste like he does. Then again neither does he, if recent reports are anything to go by.
I had to give up eventually or I would have been late for work, but when I got to work you know I kept trying throughout the day. But to no avail. And as much as the news channels were reporting how quickly the pre-sale tickets had sold out, it was fine, because we still had another chance on the Friday.
I made sure I slept in the sitting room on Thursday night, and I also left the PC on to so that it was ready for me in the morning. This time I set my alarm for 6.30am, and I was liaising with Joseph and Roxy. She had two laptops and a phone in front of her - we were on a mission! But it was almost like deja-vu, except this time I managed to get through to being told I have a 15 minute wait on the website. The clocks clearly work differently at Ticketmasterland, because after an hour and a half I still had a '15 minute waiting time.' Once again work got in the way of my life, so I had to abandon my attempts and try again at the office. No joy, all day long. And I couldn't really focus on anything else during the day, because it was all that people were talking about. One woman at work was squealing with excitement, she had managed to obtain tickets, so I phoned her extension and asked how she'd managed it and which seats she got, and I know it sounds bad, but I felt better when she said "Level 4." I decided not to be upset about it, because really I'm quite fortunate, I have seen MJ in concert three times after all, it's just that I never thought I would be able to again. I felt bad for Roxy, because she never has and she really wants to.
Imagine my surprise when I received a voicemail from SP today, telling me to call her as soon as I could. She knew she had to mention in her message that nothing bad had happened, because she knew the seriousness in her voice would make me panic! So I snuck around the corner and called her to call me back. She asked me:
"What are you doing on September the 21st?"
"Nothing that I know of."
"Good, because we're going to see Michael Jackson."
Wooooooooooooohoooooooo! I had to compose myself as much as possible, being at work and all. It turns out that American Express were given a ticket allocation, and good ole Joe-Boy was able to purchase through them. I knew he wouldn't let me down! And he was able to get some for Roxy too, so we're all going!! "I'm so exciiited, and I just can't hiiide it, I'm about to lose control and I think I like it, oh yeah!"
I'm so excited!!!! SP called me at work today and told me that Joseph had managed to get tickets to Michael Jackson's concert at the O2 Arena in September!
I don't think you understand what this means to me, and how stressful it has been to try and obtain even just one ticket. After it was announced that he would be doing shows in London, I made sure I instantly signed up to receive special codes, both on the Michael Jackson website and O2 (as I am a customer) so that I could book pre-sale tickets when they were released at 7am on 11 March, before the general release on 13 March. I received my codes the day before, so at 6.50am on the 11th I was up and ready with my PC and my phone. I was also liaising with Joseph, because we had agreed that we would both try to get four tickets each, keep the tickets with the better seats, and sell the others.
I was trying and trying and trying and trying on the phone, and trying and trying and trying and trying on the websites, and all attempts were proving fruitless for me. Joseph managed to get a little further than me, in that he was on the website, but was being told that he had a 15 minute wait. Then he finally managed to get through, but the tickets he was offered were on Level 4 - The Nose Bleed Section. There's no way either of us were willing to pay £50-75 to 'listen' to the show, so he let them go. I've already briefly experienced the view from up there when we were originally given those useless seats at the New Kids On The Block concert. No way, Jose. As much as I love the King of Pop, I don't have the money to waste like he does. Then again neither does he, if recent reports are anything to go by.
I had to give up eventually or I would have been late for work, but when I got to work you know I kept trying throughout the day. But to no avail. And as much as the news channels were reporting how quickly the pre-sale tickets had sold out, it was fine, because we still had another chance on the Friday.
I made sure I slept in the sitting room on Thursday night, and I also left the PC on to so that it was ready for me in the morning. This time I set my alarm for 6.30am, and I was liaising with Joseph and Roxy. She had two laptops and a phone in front of her - we were on a mission! But it was almost like deja-vu, except this time I managed to get through to being told I have a 15 minute wait on the website. The clocks clearly work differently at Ticketmasterland, because after an hour and a half I still had a '15 minute waiting time.' Once again work got in the way of my life, so I had to abandon my attempts and try again at the office. No joy, all day long. And I couldn't really focus on anything else during the day, because it was all that people were talking about. One woman at work was squealing with excitement, she had managed to obtain tickets, so I phoned her extension and asked how she'd managed it and which seats she got, and I know it sounds bad, but I felt better when she said "Level 4." I decided not to be upset about it, because really I'm quite fortunate, I have seen MJ in concert three times after all, it's just that I never thought I would be able to again. I felt bad for Roxy, because she never has and she really wants to.
Imagine my surprise when I received a voicemail from SP today, telling me to call her as soon as I could. She knew she had to mention in her message that nothing bad had happened, because she knew the seriousness in her voice would make me panic! So I snuck around the corner and called her to call me back. She asked me:
"What are you doing on September the 21st?"
"Nothing that I know of."
"Good, because we're going to see Michael Jackson."
Wooooooooooooohoooooooo! I had to compose myself as much as possible, being at work and all. It turns out that American Express were given a ticket allocation, and good ole Joe-Boy was able to purchase through them. I knew he wouldn't let me down! And he was able to get some for Roxy too, so we're all going!! "I'm so exciiited, and I just can't hiiide it, I'm about to lose control and I think I like it, oh yeah!"
Tuesday 10 March 2009
Me And The City
Dear Anyone,
Recently I acquired my very first item from eBay, the Sex And The City DVD boxset - all seasons. It was all so very exciting, but I won't go into that, because I know I'm the last person in the Western world to cotton onto the benefits of that site. This was about a month ago, and ever since then I have been watching an episode or two per night. And I've learned a few things about myself!
I think I'm a little bit like Carrie, in that I look for the best in a potential partner, but generally it gets thrown back in my face. One thing I have also noticed that the SATC women do is allow themselves to be open to going on at least one date with someone they meet, and admittedly I don't do that. I kind of weigh up too many options, the main one being whether I find him attractive at that moment. I'm thinking that maybe I need to stop doing that. Maybe I need to come out of my comfort zone.
The problem is that I dislike being match-made. I don't know if I've said it before, but I find it all too forced. I don't think it gives you the opportunity to become friends, because automatically you have to think of the other person as a boyfriend or girlfriend. But at the same time, I guess that's the aim, isn't it? You don't get set up with someone just to be friends, do you? Hmm... Maybe I'll give it a go when the opportunity arises... Note that I said "maybe"...
Recently I acquired my very first item from eBay, the Sex And The City DVD boxset - all seasons. It was all so very exciting, but I won't go into that, because I know I'm the last person in the Western world to cotton onto the benefits of that site. This was about a month ago, and ever since then I have been watching an episode or two per night. And I've learned a few things about myself!
I think I'm a little bit like Carrie, in that I look for the best in a potential partner, but generally it gets thrown back in my face. One thing I have also noticed that the SATC women do is allow themselves to be open to going on at least one date with someone they meet, and admittedly I don't do that. I kind of weigh up too many options, the main one being whether I find him attractive at that moment. I'm thinking that maybe I need to stop doing that. Maybe I need to come out of my comfort zone.
The problem is that I dislike being match-made. I don't know if I've said it before, but I find it all too forced. I don't think it gives you the opportunity to become friends, because automatically you have to think of the other person as a boyfriend or girlfriend. But at the same time, I guess that's the aim, isn't it? You don't get set up with someone just to be friends, do you? Hmm... Maybe I'll give it a go when the opportunity arises... Note that I said "maybe"...
Monday 9 March 2009
M.Y.O.B
Dear Anyone,
I'm getting a little tired of people who don't pay me or my bills, telling me how I should spend the money I earn. And yet they like to squander their pennies on nonsense they'll never see again.
My two cousins and I (Wonder and Ursula) are planning on going to New York this summer, for about 10 days. Now I am someone who has to get out of this country at least once a year, otherwise I'll go mad. I enjoy travelling - sue me. But because others don't feel the same, they can't understand it. So instead they tell me that I travel too much, and ask me how I can afford it, and tell me that I should be saving instead. I'm sorry, but I didn't realise you were my bank manager and every deposit or withdrawal made from my account is instantly reported to you. How do you know that I don't save? I save to go on holiday, that's why I can and you can't!!!!!
Last week I bought myself a new mobile phone, because my current one is seriously malfunctioning, and I'm not eligible for an upgrade until at least August. Obviously when you buy the handset only without a new contract to go with it, it's quite pricey. But I'm being asked "Why are you paying so much for a phone? Blah blah blah." I bought this phone on eBay, and it was far cheaper than it would have been if I had bought it in a shop. Do you honestly think I would paid for it if it meant that I couldn't survive until the next pay day? Of course not. I'm not stupid. And I am also not a shopaholic either. I know how to practice restraint - in fact I consider myself to be a true professional at being broke but not looking like it! Yet these people talk about how they spent £hundreds getting drunk and trying to live the champagne lifestyle at over-priced clubs. Once you've been to the toilet to piss and throw up, what do you have to show for it? Nada.
The way I see it, my salary is literally pittance (if you knew how much I don't earn you'd laugh at me) and the only way to keep sane is to treat myself once in a while. I was unemployed for years after university, and my current job is the longest I've held in a full-time position, so for once I have more money coming in than I ever have. If I am able to experience new things with it, why shouldn't I???
I'm getting a little tired of people who don't pay me or my bills, telling me how I should spend the money I earn. And yet they like to squander their pennies on nonsense they'll never see again.
My two cousins and I (Wonder and Ursula) are planning on going to New York this summer, for about 10 days. Now I am someone who has to get out of this country at least once a year, otherwise I'll go mad. I enjoy travelling - sue me. But because others don't feel the same, they can't understand it. So instead they tell me that I travel too much, and ask me how I can afford it, and tell me that I should be saving instead. I'm sorry, but I didn't realise you were my bank manager and every deposit or withdrawal made from my account is instantly reported to you. How do you know that I don't save? I save to go on holiday, that's why I can and you can't!!!!!
Last week I bought myself a new mobile phone, because my current one is seriously malfunctioning, and I'm not eligible for an upgrade until at least August. Obviously when you buy the handset only without a new contract to go with it, it's quite pricey. But I'm being asked "Why are you paying so much for a phone? Blah blah blah." I bought this phone on eBay, and it was far cheaper than it would have been if I had bought it in a shop. Do you honestly think I would paid for it if it meant that I couldn't survive until the next pay day? Of course not. I'm not stupid. And I am also not a shopaholic either. I know how to practice restraint - in fact I consider myself to be a true professional at being broke but not looking like it! Yet these people talk about how they spent £hundreds getting drunk and trying to live the champagne lifestyle at over-priced clubs. Once you've been to the toilet to piss and throw up, what do you have to show for it? Nada.
The way I see it, my salary is literally pittance (if you knew how much I don't earn you'd laugh at me) and the only way to keep sane is to treat myself once in a while. I was unemployed for years after university, and my current job is the longest I've held in a full-time position, so for once I have more money coming in than I ever have. If I am able to experience new things with it, why shouldn't I???
Saturday 14 February 2009
Monday 2 February 2009
One Man And Her iPod
Dear Anyone,
Last night I went to a comedy show with Shar, and although it had started to snow while we were on our way, I didn't think it would settle, because it hardly ever does. But by the time we came out of the venue, the snow was falling so heavily and had settled so deeply, that we couldn't see our way properly back to Shar's car. People had already started building 'snowthings' (because they weren't all snowmen) and the snow fights were in full swing. It took us far too long to even get back to my house, because Shar had to drive at about 5mph. It is probably the only time that traffic could go so slowly and people won't complain. Poor Shar didn't get home until after 2am.
Then this morning I received a call at about 7am from my cousin Wonder, telling me that Transport for London have suspended all buses, and most train and underground lines, due to the snow. Now the bus is the only way I get to work, so I decided to turn the TV onto Sky News and see what was going on, and to my complete satisfaction - it was true!! I figured that no-one would be able to get to work today, especially since my colleagues all come from East London, so I turned over and made myself more comfy, but still listening to the updates. I'm supposed to start work at 9.30am, so at 9.30am exactly I decided to text my team leader and ask what her situation was, and I told her that buses weren't running in my area, so I didn't know how I'd get in. I was expecting her to say that she's got no way of getting to work so she's still at home, but instead she said that she was squashed up on a train that wasn't moving, and that I should do my best to get in. Dagnammit!!
I still took my time getting ready, because I honestly couldn't think of another way to get to work besides walking, and that was something I absolutely did not want to do. I really didn't want to have to. In fact I refused to even consider the option. But I did it. And it took me an hour to get there. And I was slipping and sliding all over the place. And my legs were aching. I don't think I would have gotten through it, were it not for my iPod. I love my iPod. It keeps me company everywhere I go. As I was walking and freezing my arse off, I was singing along to the tunes aloud, and I actually didn't care who heard me.
Now I wasn't sure how to feel when I got to the deserted office at 12pm, only to be told "We're going to finish at 1pm today, because the snow is going to get worse." Do you laugh or cry? I really didn't know what to say. Obviously I was happy that I could go home early, but bloody hell - they could have told me not to bother! But it's alright. I'm trying to see the reason for everything, and I think in this case it was to make up for the fact that I didn't make it to the gym yesterday, so God wanted me to exercise in an alternative way. That's fine. I didn't actually do any work at all, because it's my team leader's birthday today, so we just spent time doing a mini celebration for her, then left the office at about 1.30pm to go and have snow fights right outside the building, before fighting the snow on our journeys home. This time I was able to take the tube half way, but I still had to walk the other half, and by the time I got home I was knackered!
The forecasters are saying that the snow is expected to continue tomorrow, so let's all cross our fingers and hope that the disruption continues!
Last night I went to a comedy show with Shar, and although it had started to snow while we were on our way, I didn't think it would settle, because it hardly ever does. But by the time we came out of the venue, the snow was falling so heavily and had settled so deeply, that we couldn't see our way properly back to Shar's car. People had already started building 'snowthings' (because they weren't all snowmen) and the snow fights were in full swing. It took us far too long to even get back to my house, because Shar had to drive at about 5mph. It is probably the only time that traffic could go so slowly and people won't complain. Poor Shar didn't get home until after 2am.
Then this morning I received a call at about 7am from my cousin Wonder, telling me that Transport for London have suspended all buses, and most train and underground lines, due to the snow. Now the bus is the only way I get to work, so I decided to turn the TV onto Sky News and see what was going on, and to my complete satisfaction - it was true!! I figured that no-one would be able to get to work today, especially since my colleagues all come from East London, so I turned over and made myself more comfy, but still listening to the updates. I'm supposed to start work at 9.30am, so at 9.30am exactly I decided to text my team leader and ask what her situation was, and I told her that buses weren't running in my area, so I didn't know how I'd get in. I was expecting her to say that she's got no way of getting to work so she's still at home, but instead she said that she was squashed up on a train that wasn't moving, and that I should do my best to get in. Dagnammit!!
I still took my time getting ready, because I honestly couldn't think of another way to get to work besides walking, and that was something I absolutely did not want to do. I really didn't want to have to. In fact I refused to even consider the option. But I did it. And it took me an hour to get there. And I was slipping and sliding all over the place. And my legs were aching. I don't think I would have gotten through it, were it not for my iPod. I love my iPod. It keeps me company everywhere I go. As I was walking and freezing my arse off, I was singing along to the tunes aloud, and I actually didn't care who heard me.
Now I wasn't sure how to feel when I got to the deserted office at 12pm, only to be told "We're going to finish at 1pm today, because the snow is going to get worse." Do you laugh or cry? I really didn't know what to say. Obviously I was happy that I could go home early, but bloody hell - they could have told me not to bother! But it's alright. I'm trying to see the reason for everything, and I think in this case it was to make up for the fact that I didn't make it to the gym yesterday, so God wanted me to exercise in an alternative way. That's fine. I didn't actually do any work at all, because it's my team leader's birthday today, so we just spent time doing a mini celebration for her, then left the office at about 1.30pm to go and have snow fights right outside the building, before fighting the snow on our journeys home. This time I was able to take the tube half way, but I still had to walk the other half, and by the time I got home I was knackered!
The forecasters are saying that the snow is expected to continue tomorrow, so let's all cross our fingers and hope that the disruption continues!
Sunday 25 January 2009
Let's Get Physical
Dear Anyone,
So I have finally managed to get myself to a gym, at long last, and I didn't workout as much as I wanted to, but I sweated severely, and I guess that's what counts. And I know I'll be aching tomorrow for sure.
Do you remember Bumper? Well he works at a gym, so with this year being the year of the Credit Crunch and all, I'm utilising my contacts and going to use it for free every weekend. Plus he is also a Personal Trainer, so he said he'll do a fat-burning program for me to follow. That would be tres helpful.
I plan to stick to is as much as possible, even though it's extremely hard for me to leave my house on Sundays (it's the day of rest!), and I'm already thinking that I'm going to get my hair done this Saturday, and my sweating the next day might spoil the texture. But I'll find a way to make it work. Look out for a trimmer me coming to a summer near you! I hope...
So I have finally managed to get myself to a gym, at long last, and I didn't workout as much as I wanted to, but I sweated severely, and I guess that's what counts. And I know I'll be aching tomorrow for sure.
Do you remember Bumper? Well he works at a gym, so with this year being the year of the Credit Crunch and all, I'm utilising my contacts and going to use it for free every weekend. Plus he is also a Personal Trainer, so he said he'll do a fat-burning program for me to follow. That would be tres helpful.
I plan to stick to is as much as possible, even though it's extremely hard for me to leave my house on Sundays (it's the day of rest!), and I'm already thinking that I'm going to get my hair done this Saturday, and my sweating the next day might spoil the texture. But I'll find a way to make it work. Look out for a trimmer me coming to a summer near you! I hope...
New Kids On The Blog II
Dear Anyone,
I've just come back from re-living my childhood at the O2 Arena!! I've finally seen New Kids On The Block live!! And it was sooooooooo good. They didn't disappoint at all. And before you ask - no, they're not old men, and yes, they can still move!
I went with my cousin Wonder, my friend Roxy and her sister. Roxy had booked the tickets in September (as I have previously mentioned) but the tickets only arrived just before Christmas. Roxy didn't even look at them properly, she just went and locked them in a safe straight away!
When we got to the venue and made our way to our seats, there was no way we were staying there. They had put us in the seats right at the top, where you could literally touch the ceiling! Why??? Those were definitely not the seats that Roxy had booked, because I specifically remember her telling me at the time that we would be on ground level in the second block, so every time I thought about it, that's where I pictured us. Fortunately when we took them to the ticket desk, the girls behind the counter changed them for us, and gave us seats on the side, from where we could see the whole stage, but they told us not to tell anyone, because they weren't really allowed to do that, and they'd had to turn away whole families. Then when we got to our seats the girls in front of us told us that their original seats were even higher than ours, and they were also told not to tell anyone of their seating change. It turns out that almost everyone in our block had been moved if they'd asked, because the concert was being filmed for a DVD and they didn't want any gaps in the audience. I almost wanted to take back my sincere thanks to the desk girls, but because I'm a nice person, I didn't.
Like I said before, the concert was wicked. They opened with their current song, but most of it featured all the old tunes. We screamed like teeny-boppers, especially Wonder, because as sad as I am to announce this, at the age of 29.... this was her first ever concert. Yep. That's right. Her first. I don't know what she's been doing all these years. Actually I do, but I won't expose her. She kept saying to me beforehand that she thinks she might faint, and she didn't understand why I was saying that if she did she would be going alone to the first aid room. Why would you faint?? Why waste a ticket by fainting?? This isn't Michael Jackson we're talking about. Even then, when I saw him in concert, fainting wasn't an option! If I'd met him however, then that might be an altogether different story. Anyway...
Wonder kept screaming "I love you Donnie!! Donnie I love you!!" It was hilarious! I can't think of anything they didn't sing that they should have, and what was best of all was that Jordan sang his solo tune 'Give It To You'. I love it!!!!!!!!!! I wish they hadn't have changed the dance routine, but hey it was all good.
The only thing I didn't really understand was why there were kids there who probably weren't even born when NKOTB split up. You can't tell me that their mums knew really early on that they wouldn't find babysitters, so they bought them tickets instead. There was a little girl sitting in front of us, and she was bored out of her brains. She sat down for the most part of it, watching other people's reactions. She must have thought we were crazy. Donnie carried one young girl up on stage, and she was looking at him like she couldn't make out what he was, almost as though she was disgusted by what she was seeing. Waste!
Now I think this new wave of boyband/girlband reunions is a good thing (though no one has made it as lucrative as Take That have). It provides a nice trip down memory lane. My cousin Ursula went to the Spice Girls reunion concert a year ago (yep she's a lot younger than me) and she had a blast, so she knows the excitement I felt. Living in the past is where it's at!
I've just come back from re-living my childhood at the O2 Arena!! I've finally seen New Kids On The Block live!! And it was sooooooooo good. They didn't disappoint at all. And before you ask - no, they're not old men, and yes, they can still move!
I went with my cousin Wonder, my friend Roxy and her sister. Roxy had booked the tickets in September (as I have previously mentioned) but the tickets only arrived just before Christmas. Roxy didn't even look at them properly, she just went and locked them in a safe straight away!
When we got to the venue and made our way to our seats, there was no way we were staying there. They had put us in the seats right at the top, where you could literally touch the ceiling! Why??? Those were definitely not the seats that Roxy had booked, because I specifically remember her telling me at the time that we would be on ground level in the second block, so every time I thought about it, that's where I pictured us. Fortunately when we took them to the ticket desk, the girls behind the counter changed them for us, and gave us seats on the side, from where we could see the whole stage, but they told us not to tell anyone, because they weren't really allowed to do that, and they'd had to turn away whole families. Then when we got to our seats the girls in front of us told us that their original seats were even higher than ours, and they were also told not to tell anyone of their seating change. It turns out that almost everyone in our block had been moved if they'd asked, because the concert was being filmed for a DVD and they didn't want any gaps in the audience. I almost wanted to take back my sincere thanks to the desk girls, but because I'm a nice person, I didn't.
Like I said before, the concert was wicked. They opened with their current song, but most of it featured all the old tunes. We screamed like teeny-boppers, especially Wonder, because as sad as I am to announce this, at the age of 29.... this was her first ever concert. Yep. That's right. Her first. I don't know what she's been doing all these years. Actually I do, but I won't expose her. She kept saying to me beforehand that she thinks she might faint, and she didn't understand why I was saying that if she did she would be going alone to the first aid room. Why would you faint?? Why waste a ticket by fainting?? This isn't Michael Jackson we're talking about. Even then, when I saw him in concert, fainting wasn't an option! If I'd met him however, then that might be an altogether different story. Anyway...
Wonder kept screaming "I love you Donnie!! Donnie I love you!!" It was hilarious! I can't think of anything they didn't sing that they should have, and what was best of all was that Jordan sang his solo tune 'Give It To You'. I love it!!!!!!!!!! I wish they hadn't have changed the dance routine, but hey it was all good.
The only thing I didn't really understand was why there were kids there who probably weren't even born when NKOTB split up. You can't tell me that their mums knew really early on that they wouldn't find babysitters, so they bought them tickets instead. There was a little girl sitting in front of us, and she was bored out of her brains. She sat down for the most part of it, watching other people's reactions. She must have thought we were crazy. Donnie carried one young girl up on stage, and she was looking at him like she couldn't make out what he was, almost as though she was disgusted by what she was seeing. Waste!
Now I think this new wave of boyband/girlband reunions is a good thing (though no one has made it as lucrative as Take That have). It provides a nice trip down memory lane. My cousin Ursula went to the Spice Girls reunion concert a year ago (yep she's a lot younger than me) and she had a blast, so she knows the excitement I felt. Living in the past is where it's at!
Wednesday 21 January 2009
Job Seeker
Dear Anyone,
Today I felt extremely wound up at work, to the point that I think it was the cause of the headache I had toward the end of the day (which miraculously disappeared when I left the building). My colleagues were behaving a little childishly, and I felt like a teacher who had to make simple decisions and tell people off for silly things. My team leader was off today, so because I've been in charge of the shifts and workflow, they all tried to pass things on to me as if we didn't have a senior there. So annoying.
I really, really want a new job, and to be honest I'm a little scared that I won't find one due to this recession. Today's headlines were focussed on how the unemployment figure has risen, as well as the number of those on Jobseeker's Allowance. I DO NOT WANT TO GO BACK ON JOBSEEKERS ALLOWANCE EVER AGAIN. Therefore I won't be leaving this job before I find another, but if I don't find one soon I think I'll go mad. There shouldn't be so much unemployment if the vacancies we see advertised are real. I'm starting to believe that the job ads we see in newspapers, websites, etc, are devised by these publications to lure readers. They have to be. Why is it taking me so long? I've tweaked my CV as much as I can, and looked at so many different ways of writing a cover letter, and I've decided that these things are a matter of personal preference. There is no right way, there are just different ways.
But I know I have to go back to what I asked God to help me with: patience. I just have to be patient because apparently it's going to happen for me. Apparently. I have an application here for the position of Events Assistant for a charity (and surprise surprise I've applied for this one before) so I'm off to fill it out to the best of my ability, and just wait....
Today I felt extremely wound up at work, to the point that I think it was the cause of the headache I had toward the end of the day (which miraculously disappeared when I left the building). My colleagues were behaving a little childishly, and I felt like a teacher who had to make simple decisions and tell people off for silly things. My team leader was off today, so because I've been in charge of the shifts and workflow, they all tried to pass things on to me as if we didn't have a senior there. So annoying.
I really, really want a new job, and to be honest I'm a little scared that I won't find one due to this recession. Today's headlines were focussed on how the unemployment figure has risen, as well as the number of those on Jobseeker's Allowance. I DO NOT WANT TO GO BACK ON JOBSEEKERS ALLOWANCE EVER AGAIN. Therefore I won't be leaving this job before I find another, but if I don't find one soon I think I'll go mad. There shouldn't be so much unemployment if the vacancies we see advertised are real. I'm starting to believe that the job ads we see in newspapers, websites, etc, are devised by these publications to lure readers. They have to be. Why is it taking me so long? I've tweaked my CV as much as I can, and looked at so many different ways of writing a cover letter, and I've decided that these things are a matter of personal preference. There is no right way, there are just different ways.
But I know I have to go back to what I asked God to help me with: patience. I just have to be patient because apparently it's going to happen for me. Apparently. I have an application here for the position of Events Assistant for a charity (and surprise surprise I've applied for this one before) so I'm off to fill it out to the best of my ability, and just wait....
Tuesday 20 January 2009
Yes We Can!
Dear Anyone,
Now I would like to appeal to any red-necks who may accidentally find themselves reading this: give Obama a chance please. Don't just look at the the colour of his skin, listen to what he has said, and if anything, challenge him to see if he delivers. Let him serve at least one term. He is half white after all. If you have to, only like his white side. Think about the fact that as a baby he was fed by a white woman's breast. Will that comfort you? I hope so.
I am so glad I was able to watch the inauguration live, because I didn't think it would be possible, since it was being shown from 4pm, and I don't finish work until 6pm. But luckily my team leader was able to get the security men in the building to switch the plasma TV to BBC1, and we (plus a quite a few others in our office) were able to watch the swearing in and speech live. I'm quite sure he memorised the whole thing, because he clearly wasn't looking at any sheet of paper, and obviously there was no tele-prompter. But it was a very positive and inspirational speech, and I pray to God that he is able to serve at least one term successfully, and implement all that he's planning. The hard work begins tomorrow...
Now repeat after me - YES WE CAN!
Saturday 17 January 2009
Home Alone
Dear Anyone,
I'd just like to say that it is Friday night, and I have the house all to myself. Although it would be the perfect time to have someone round (if there was someone), I'm really enjoying the time alone. I've had a nice dinner, I'm playing loads of Scrabble games online, and watching nonsense on TV - it's great! The only thing missing is my duvet, but I can't be arsed to get to go and get it.
Just thought I'd keep you posted!
Ta-ra!
I'd just like to say that it is Friday night, and I have the house all to myself. Although it would be the perfect time to have someone round (if there was someone), I'm really enjoying the time alone. I've had a nice dinner, I'm playing loads of Scrabble games online, and watching nonsense on TV - it's great! The only thing missing is my duvet, but I can't be arsed to get to go and get it.
Just thought I'd keep you posted!
Ta-ra!
Monday 12 January 2009
Time To Get Serious
Dear Anyone,
I've recently discovered that my workplace might start holding Weight Watchers meetings at lunchtimes. That would be perfect for me, because I can't find any other time that would be convenient, and since work gets in the way of life, the least they could do is help me out! I've done Weight Watchers before, a few years ago, and I definitely think it's the best diet around. It's realistic and all about portion control really. You can eat whatever you want as long as you remain within your point allowance. It also helped me to see just how crap some foods are. For example, my point allowance was 22 points per day. Now when I go to McDonalds I would usually have a Big Mac meal or a Quarter Pounder meal. When I looked it up in the Weight watchers 'Eating Out' book, a Big Mac meal came up to a total of 21 and a half points! Just that alone would leave me with half a point for the rest of the day! And McDonalds would usually just be lunch - I would have already had breakfast and be planning what to have for dinner! That helped to put things into perspective. So I think it will be next week that we find out whether the meetings will go ahead at work, because people have to register their interest by this Friday, and permission will be granted if they can get 25 names. Fingers crossed! Plus I have a friend (Bumper) who works at a gym, so with him there I'd get free access - no excuse really.
With driving - I started my driving lessons back in 2003 with the AA (which back then was pretty expensive), but I had to stop when we moved to a different area. Then I was unemployed, soI couldn't afford to take it up again, and I guess I just procrastinated after that. But the thought of driving makes me quite nervous, and I never used to actually look forward to my lessons. I feel like there is far too much to concentrate on all at once, and I might be one of those nervous drivers who makes stupid mistakes. When my friends are driving and start effing and blinding at other drivers, unless it's a blatant stupid mistake, I try not to comment, because for all I know that might be me in the future! But I know it's something I have to do. I know London has a very good transport system, but I refuse to still be taking buses when I have children. I can not be one of those mums who struggle to fold up a pushchair in time for the bus's arrival, or be refused access on to the bus because there are already two pushchairs aboard. No thank you.
As it stands though, I'll have to wait until February to get things in motion, because January is the brokest month ever and I'm really feeling it. But I'm determined to see these things through.
Thursday 8 January 2009
Old School Gal
Dear Anyone,
Most of my closest associates think that I don't appreciate any type of music if it isn't soca. That's so untrue though. Admittedly I love soca. I like music I can dance to, because I really enjoy dancing, I can't help it. But the main reason that it seems it's all about soca for me is that I just don't think current R&B and Hip-hop are as good as they were in the 80s and 90s.
These days when I download music to my iPod, it's the old school jams that excite me. The radio stations in Ghana played a lot of old tunes, and I found that I knew all the words to most of them - something I don't think I can say about songs now. I think part of it comes from my first year at University. I lived in student halls, and we didn't have a television, so it was all about music as entertainment. I don't think I've ever listened to so much music in my life! Back then the singles would be released on Monday and would cost 99p or £1.99 at Our Price (remember that??) so with a student loan in my account, they were easily affordable. Now of course it's all about downloading and what-not. I'm a very old school girl, I still have my cassettes and my VHS tapes and video recorder that I don't ever intend to throw away. But I digress...
I think all original beats have been used, so it's all about recycling. I'm sick of the silly dirty south songs, because they all sound the same. I'm not into concious or hardcore hip-hop or Neo-soul, maybe one or two random tunes, but generally they bore me. Sorry. My friends make fun of me saying that I wouldn't like certain songs because they're too slow, but when did I ever say I don't like slow jams? I do, just not all of them all the time.
I even find that I can relate to the lyrics of old school songs. Back when I liked Boy Wonder, I randomly heard Brandy's 'I Wanna Be Down' somewhere, and the realisation of what she was saying was like an epiphany! It was exactly what I wanted to say to him. I also related a song called 'It's The Falling In Love' on Michael Jackson's 'Off The Wall' album to.... someone else recently. Not literally off course, but the gist of it.
So I do appreciate other types of music, people. I'm just a bit bored of it nowadays, and I like to go back in time to the days when music was fun!
Most of my closest associates think that I don't appreciate any type of music if it isn't soca. That's so untrue though. Admittedly I love soca. I like music I can dance to, because I really enjoy dancing, I can't help it. But the main reason that it seems it's all about soca for me is that I just don't think current R&B and Hip-hop are as good as they were in the 80s and 90s.
These days when I download music to my iPod, it's the old school jams that excite me. The radio stations in Ghana played a lot of old tunes, and I found that I knew all the words to most of them - something I don't think I can say about songs now. I think part of it comes from my first year at University. I lived in student halls, and we didn't have a television, so it was all about music as entertainment. I don't think I've ever listened to so much music in my life! Back then the singles would be released on Monday and would cost 99p or £1.99 at Our Price (remember that??) so with a student loan in my account, they were easily affordable. Now of course it's all about downloading and what-not. I'm a very old school girl, I still have my cassettes and my VHS tapes and video recorder that I don't ever intend to throw away. But I digress...
I think all original beats have been used, so it's all about recycling. I'm sick of the silly dirty south songs, because they all sound the same. I'm not into concious or hardcore hip-hop or Neo-soul, maybe one or two random tunes, but generally they bore me. Sorry. My friends make fun of me saying that I wouldn't like certain songs because they're too slow, but when did I ever say I don't like slow jams? I do, just not all of them all the time.
I even find that I can relate to the lyrics of old school songs. Back when I liked Boy Wonder, I randomly heard Brandy's 'I Wanna Be Down' somewhere, and the realisation of what she was saying was like an epiphany! It was exactly what I wanted to say to him. I also related a song called 'It's The Falling In Love' on Michael Jackson's 'Off The Wall' album to.... someone else recently. Not literally off course, but the gist of it.
So I do appreciate other types of music, people. I'm just a bit bored of it nowadays, and I like to go back in time to the days when music was fun!
Thursday 1 January 2009
Winter Sun
Dear Anyone,
Happy New Year!
I've been in Ghana since Christmas Day, and I have to say that I'm actually enjoying it this time. I don't usually have that much fun, because there isn't anyone for me to hang out with, since most of my cousins moved to England, but this time they all came for my dad's 60th birthday and retirement party. I came with my two brothers, my youngest brother's girlfriend and my nephew.
I've had the most tiring day today though. Today was the 'Visit Family' day, and it started very early, which is why I didn't see fit to go out last night. My brothers and cousin did though, and you should have seen them struggle through today! Very funny.
We had to leave home at about 7.45am to get to my dad's hometown for a church service. Along with their usual sermon, they were also having a thanksgiving section for him for his retirement, and I think he's quite important in his town. Three and a half hours! And it wasn't in English so I hardly had a clue what was going on. The worst part (or maybe I shouldn't say 'worst', more 'embarassing') was when they said they had the band there especially for my dad and his family, so we all had to get up and dance around the church while they played. I'm too shy for things like that! But it was nice of them I guess.
My brothers and I didn't stay for the whole service, because we had to go and see my mum's family, the most important being her eldest sister who is more like a grandma to us. She's not been very well since she had a stroke a few years ago. But seeing her again has made me decide that I'm not going to Ghana again until I have a boyfriend. The last time I saw her was when we went there three years ago, and she told me to hurry up and find someone, so that she can see my child before she's gone. That was three whole years ago, and I'm still not any closer to fulfilling her wish. Obviously I'm not rushing anything with anyone to make someone else happy, but I would love it it if she was still here to see my child. She asked me again, and I wanted to laugh, because the way she put it was as though she thought I have no interest in men, and that I am the one shying away from finding someone. I wish! But she hasn't been the only one asking, I'm getting it from all over - even my dad! That's how I know it's serious. But I'm glad my aunty has at least been able to meet my nephew Hurricane.
We also went to briefly visit my grandad (mum's dad), another of her sisters, and also to see the plot of land she's having her house built on. It's a long drive back to Accra, but thank goodness we're home now. I'm really tired.
I've been having fun though. We've been out to a few places, like a karaoke bar called Champs, which was funny (but we didn't participate of course), a club called Rhapsody in the new Accra Mall. The mall is impressive though. It looks very Westernised and seems to be the teenage hangout. It's got clothes shops, electrical shops, perfume shop, gift shops, a food court, and a cinema upstairs. We didn't actually go to the cinema so I don't know what was showing. Ghana's coming up! We also went swimming at La Palm Royal Beach Hotel (well I didn't swim, I watched) and we plan to go to a beach called Bojo Beach, which apparently is very nice. That might have to be on Sunday, because my brother and his girlfriend have planned a day together tomorrow, and my dad's party is on Saturday.
I've been like a mum for the holiday, because I'm the primary carer of Hurricane. My brother - his dad - has had to stay in my dad's other house due to space, so I share a room with him and it is hard work! But he LOVES it in Ghana - all the space to run about that he doesn't get in London.
And every other time we've been drinking! There is so much readily available alcohol in this house, it's hard not to! But you'll be pleased to know that I haven't been (really) drunk.... yet, and I certainly will not be touching a drop of alcohol until at least February, starting from the minute I step into London on 6 January. Promise.
Happy New Year!
I've been in Ghana since Christmas Day, and I have to say that I'm actually enjoying it this time. I don't usually have that much fun, because there isn't anyone for me to hang out with, since most of my cousins moved to England, but this time they all came for my dad's 60th birthday and retirement party. I came with my two brothers, my youngest brother's girlfriend and my nephew.
I've had the most tiring day today though. Today was the 'Visit Family' day, and it started very early, which is why I didn't see fit to go out last night. My brothers and cousin did though, and you should have seen them struggle through today! Very funny.
We had to leave home at about 7.45am to get to my dad's hometown for a church service. Along with their usual sermon, they were also having a thanksgiving section for him for his retirement, and I think he's quite important in his town. Three and a half hours! And it wasn't in English so I hardly had a clue what was going on. The worst part (or maybe I shouldn't say 'worst', more 'embarassing') was when they said they had the band there especially for my dad and his family, so we all had to get up and dance around the church while they played. I'm too shy for things like that! But it was nice of them I guess.
My brothers and I didn't stay for the whole service, because we had to go and see my mum's family, the most important being her eldest sister who is more like a grandma to us. She's not been very well since she had a stroke a few years ago. But seeing her again has made me decide that I'm not going to Ghana again until I have a boyfriend. The last time I saw her was when we went there three years ago, and she told me to hurry up and find someone, so that she can see my child before she's gone. That was three whole years ago, and I'm still not any closer to fulfilling her wish. Obviously I'm not rushing anything with anyone to make someone else happy, but I would love it it if she was still here to see my child. She asked me again, and I wanted to laugh, because the way she put it was as though she thought I have no interest in men, and that I am the one shying away from finding someone. I wish! But she hasn't been the only one asking, I'm getting it from all over - even my dad! That's how I know it's serious. But I'm glad my aunty has at least been able to meet my nephew Hurricane.
We also went to briefly visit my grandad (mum's dad), another of her sisters, and also to see the plot of land she's having her house built on. It's a long drive back to Accra, but thank goodness we're home now. I'm really tired.
I've been having fun though. We've been out to a few places, like a karaoke bar called Champs, which was funny (but we didn't participate of course), a club called Rhapsody in the new Accra Mall. The mall is impressive though. It looks very Westernised and seems to be the teenage hangout. It's got clothes shops, electrical shops, perfume shop, gift shops, a food court, and a cinema upstairs. We didn't actually go to the cinema so I don't know what was showing. Ghana's coming up! We also went swimming at La Palm Royal Beach Hotel (well I didn't swim, I watched) and we plan to go to a beach called Bojo Beach, which apparently is very nice. That might have to be on Sunday, because my brother and his girlfriend have planned a day together tomorrow, and my dad's party is on Saturday.
I've been like a mum for the holiday, because I'm the primary carer of Hurricane. My brother - his dad - has had to stay in my dad's other house due to space, so I share a room with him and it is hard work! But he LOVES it in Ghana - all the space to run about that he doesn't get in London.
And every other time we've been drinking! There is so much readily available alcohol in this house, it's hard not to! But you'll be pleased to know that I haven't been (really) drunk.... yet, and I certainly will not be touching a drop of alcohol until at least February, starting from the minute I step into London on 6 January. Promise.
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