Back in 09

Dear Anyone,


Although we have not yet entered 2010, and it's a little early to be reciting my resolutions, I would just like to inform you of one I have made. I will be leaving all these Doing-Nothing-For-Me men back in 2009.


I have decided to leave the idea of Muscle here in 2009. Yes, he ticks most of the boxes on my list, and yes, I probably held a fraction of hope that one day maybe, just maybe, we might actually get together, but I've accepted that it more than likely won't happen. I came to this conclusion a couple of weeks ago when I called him just to catch up, since we hadn't spoken for a while. It was a Sunday afternoon and he said he was just chilling at home, but he kept yawning, and I think the thing that cemented it for me was the fact that he ended the conversation. They say that the one who made the call should be the one to end it, and if the other person does, then they are probably bored or don't want to speak to you. I'm not saying there was any type of malicious intent, but maybe I should just take a hint. So I will. We'll always be friends, because I think he's a great guy, but any sort of harboured hope I may hold will no longer remain.


As for Tod, the whole 'it is what it is' won't be any longer. It's really not worth it and I deserve 100% better. Entertaining him is compromising who I am and what I actually want. I know there are many girls who he spins the same lyrics to as he spins to me, so I just don't see why I should lower myself. Again with him I'll also remain friends, but nothing further.


The Body isn't even really worth mentioning. He calls or messages me probably when I cross his mind every few weeks, and aside from him being young, I feel he is someone who wants to be chased and expects a girl to come to him on his own time, and that doesn't work for me. He'll ask when I'm free, and he will want it to be at that momemt that he's contacted me, when I'm usually busy, but he won't make an effort to arrange a time and make it happen, which is annoying really. Hot boy, but I need a hot man.


So hopefully, together with your prayers and my strength, I will leave these people (as I've known them) here at the end of 2009, and begin the new decade with a new network and new opportunities and experiences.