Dear Anyone,
I hate my job. Yeah, we're back on this again. Right now I'm at my desk, not supposed to be on the internet (but whatever), with a HUGE pile of paperwork to file away, which is late by the way, and I can't seem to bring myself to give a shite. I'm doing it, but my frustration builds with each file I reach for. Others here seem not to mind , but I actually couldn't care less about any of it. Instead I'm fantasising about what it must be like to love what you do. What a lovely feeling that must be.
I'm also thinking about leaving and going back to temping. Being a receptionist is a whole lot better than the monotonous, never-ending tasks I have to do here. The only problem with that is you never know how abruptly the job will end. Actually I don't mind that part at all, because an unexpected day off is a blessing, but it's the financial side of it, so I guess that won't be a good idea. BUT I NEED TO DO SOMETHING!!!!!!
Last month I joined a website for people who want to do internships in New York City, and I received a message from a company who run a website that sells designer clothing for children. The lady asked me if I would be interested in interning with them, so I discussed it with my life coach, and replied asking them when they would need someone to start, and how long they would like someone there for. I figured I could go for a month, so I would ask my employers here if it would be possible to take unpaid leave, see if I could get a donation from the Bank of Daddy, otherwise take out a small loan with the bank if necessary, and stay with my friend in New Jersey. It's not as impossible as I originally made it out to be in my head. But up till now I am yet to receive a response from them. It's ok though, because at least it made me start thinking about how I would realistically set the wheels in motion.
Emperor also told me about vacancies they have at his workplace in the city. The roles available are PA roles, which isn't media related as I would like it to be, but the money is WAY better than the pittance I'm whoring myself for here, and some of the roles are temporary, which is fine because I can still search for jobs, and at the very least I will be in a new environment. I sent him my re-worked CV, so I am awaiting news...
Anyway I better get back to this nonsense before someone comes and hassles me, which will result in me socking them in their face, then being suspended pending disciplinary action... Hmm then again....
Wednesday 17 February 2010
Sunday 14 February 2010
Schmalentines
Dear Anyone,
Yes I know the occasion celebrated today is a pagan/man made event, and it is designed to make us singletons feel like shite, and that you should not just focus on partners, but family and friends you love, and I do appreciate them whole-heartedly, and I have even been out today to treat myself to something new, using the theory that if I don't then no one will............... but I can't shake off the Single-and-feeling-like-shite-because-I-am-experiencing-my-32nd-Valentines-Day-alone feeling. (Yes I know it doesn't really kick in till teenage years, but I can't be bothered to do the math right now). And this proves that playing the field doesn't make a damn bit of difference in the long-run. Back to the drawing board I guess.
That's all. Rant over.
Yes I know the occasion celebrated today is a pagan/man made event, and it is designed to make us singletons feel like shite, and that you should not just focus on partners, but family and friends you love, and I do appreciate them whole-heartedly, and I have even been out today to treat myself to something new, using the theory that if I don't then no one will............... but I can't shake off the Single-and-feeling-like-shite-because-I-am-experiencing-my-32nd-Valentines-Day-alone feeling. (Yes I know it doesn't really kick in till teenage years, but I can't be bothered to do the math right now). And this proves that playing the field doesn't make a damn bit of difference in the long-run. Back to the drawing board I guess.
That's all. Rant over.
Thursday 4 February 2010
Prince Charmer
Dear Anyone,
I know I seem to be talking about guys quite a bit recently, but making an effort to play the field brings with it some escapades! Last night I went to dinner with my friend Emperor, and I don't know whether or not it was a date, but if it was, then it was the most perfect date I've had yet!
Let me give you a little background: Emperor and I became friends last summer, while I was in New York with my cousins. I had posted a status on Facebook about how annoyed I was that they had chosen to waste a nice day in NYC by sleeping, so he asked me for my Blackberry messenger pin (don't worry - we have a mutual friend, so he wasn't a complete stranger), and we basically got to know each other over the course of the next few months. He's handsome, funny, intelligent, has a very good job, etc etc, but I never allowed myself to think of him as anything other than a friend, because he's always been in a relationship. We met in person for the first time at a party in November, and saw each other again in up North in December, where he told me that he'd broken up with the girlfriend earlier that week, and that led to us becoming a little intimate that weekend, which then led to confusion and complication in my head.
Anyway, he'd promised to take me out for a friendly dinner in early December, but then had to postpone due to work, so we finally managed to reschedule. We arranged to meet up in the city at 7.45pm and both arrived at exactly 7.45pm (we must have been starving!). He showed me around the area briefly, because that's more or less where he works, then we headed to the restaurant - a very nice place that specialises mainly in steaks. Everyone seemed to have heard of it but me! He'd booked the table for 8pm, but it wasn't quite ready, so we started with a bottle of Rose while we waited, and just chatted away. He was a little frustrated from his day at work, so he was venting, which was cool. When our table was ready we went down in a lift, they brought our bottle and glasses for us and took our coats, showed us to our seats - it was all very posh dahling. The meal was lovely and filling, we had another bottle of Rose, converstaion flowed wonderfully (we spoke about almost everything and anything random) - I had such a good night, even though at times I felt a bit like Crocodile Dundeena who had been plucked from the village and dropped in the middle of the metropolis! Throughout the evening whenever I looked at him I thought to myself: "Wow, you're actually the definition of handsome."
After he settled the bill, it was way past 11pm and he asked the waitress to call a cab for us -something I definitely was not expecting. I'm used to paying for my own cab, or being escorted to the bus stop, so this moved him even further into the 'What A Gentleman!' box. And to top it off, he lives nowhere near me, but the cab dropped me home first before taking him... wow indeed. During the journey he told me that I looked nice (and thought that I must have been insulting him for not saying it to me sooner, but of course I wasn't) and then administered his man manoeuvres that resulted in us holding hands. I thought it was so funny and sweet, but obviously I was laughing inside. Then he told me that he would like to kiss me, so I thought it was ample time to ask him about his relationship status. Now, looking back over the experiences I have had with men over the past few years, what would you guess his response was?.......................................................... Those of you who shouted "He's unavailable, didn't you realise it was too good to be true?!" should give yourselves a gold star and a pat on the back. He said that they broke up in December, got back together in January, but he hadn't seen her for a while, so it has been very on/off. I think my whole body physically deflated, and he probably noticed it too. Story of my life really. I told him that he needs to sort it out once and for all, because I'm not interested into the sharing thing, and he said he hears what I'm saying. I hope so.
When we arrived at my place I told him he could walk me to my door, so he did. I thanked him for a lovely evening, and he thanked me for coming out with him. Now, I don't know about you, but I like it when the things I do include a beginning, a middle and an end, and after such a nice evening I didn't feel it would have been right to just shake hands or hug and then go our separate ways....... so I let him kiss me instead. And I didn't feel bad one bit, because I think I deserved it. So there. He invited me to go back to his place with him, but I think he was just caught up in the moment, because that wasn't going to happen, so I politely declined. I left about half an hour before I sent him a message to say thanks again, and that I really would like him to decide what his situation is, and he said he would. Then I went to sleep smiling....
I know I seem to be talking about guys quite a bit recently, but making an effort to play the field brings with it some escapades! Last night I went to dinner with my friend Emperor, and I don't know whether or not it was a date, but if it was, then it was the most perfect date I've had yet!
Let me give you a little background: Emperor and I became friends last summer, while I was in New York with my cousins. I had posted a status on Facebook about how annoyed I was that they had chosen to waste a nice day in NYC by sleeping, so he asked me for my Blackberry messenger pin (don't worry - we have a mutual friend, so he wasn't a complete stranger), and we basically got to know each other over the course of the next few months. He's handsome, funny, intelligent, has a very good job, etc etc, but I never allowed myself to think of him as anything other than a friend, because he's always been in a relationship. We met in person for the first time at a party in November, and saw each other again in up North in December, where he told me that he'd broken up with the girlfriend earlier that week, and that led to us becoming a little intimate that weekend, which then led to confusion and complication in my head.
Anyway, he'd promised to take me out for a friendly dinner in early December, but then had to postpone due to work, so we finally managed to reschedule. We arranged to meet up in the city at 7.45pm and both arrived at exactly 7.45pm (we must have been starving!). He showed me around the area briefly, because that's more or less where he works, then we headed to the restaurant - a very nice place that specialises mainly in steaks. Everyone seemed to have heard of it but me! He'd booked the table for 8pm, but it wasn't quite ready, so we started with a bottle of Rose while we waited, and just chatted away. He was a little frustrated from his day at work, so he was venting, which was cool. When our table was ready we went down in a lift, they brought our bottle and glasses for us and took our coats, showed us to our seats - it was all very posh dahling. The meal was lovely and filling, we had another bottle of Rose, converstaion flowed wonderfully (we spoke about almost everything and anything random) - I had such a good night, even though at times I felt a bit like Crocodile Dundeena who had been plucked from the village and dropped in the middle of the metropolis! Throughout the evening whenever I looked at him I thought to myself: "Wow, you're actually the definition of handsome."
After he settled the bill, it was way past 11pm and he asked the waitress to call a cab for us -something I definitely was not expecting. I'm used to paying for my own cab, or being escorted to the bus stop, so this moved him even further into the 'What A Gentleman!' box. And to top it off, he lives nowhere near me, but the cab dropped me home first before taking him... wow indeed. During the journey he told me that I looked nice (and thought that I must have been insulting him for not saying it to me sooner, but of course I wasn't) and then administered his man manoeuvres that resulted in us holding hands. I thought it was so funny and sweet, but obviously I was laughing inside. Then he told me that he would like to kiss me, so I thought it was ample time to ask him about his relationship status. Now, looking back over the experiences I have had with men over the past few years, what would you guess his response was?.......................................................... Those of you who shouted "He's unavailable, didn't you realise it was too good to be true?!" should give yourselves a gold star and a pat on the back. He said that they broke up in December, got back together in January, but he hadn't seen her for a while, so it has been very on/off. I think my whole body physically deflated, and he probably noticed it too. Story of my life really. I told him that he needs to sort it out once and for all, because I'm not interested into the sharing thing, and he said he hears what I'm saying. I hope so.
When we arrived at my place I told him he could walk me to my door, so he did. I thanked him for a lovely evening, and he thanked me for coming out with him. Now, I don't know about you, but I like it when the things I do include a beginning, a middle and an end, and after such a nice evening I didn't feel it would have been right to just shake hands or hug and then go our separate ways....... so I let him kiss me instead. And I didn't feel bad one bit, because I think I deserved it. So there. He invited me to go back to his place with him, but I think he was just caught up in the moment, because that wasn't going to happen, so I politely declined. I left about half an hour before I sent him a message to say thanks again, and that I really would like him to decide what his situation is, and he said he would. Then I went to sleep smiling....
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