Saturday 15 December 2007

Maybe I Should, Maybe I Shouldn't Have

Dear Anyone,

Okay confession time..... I went to Undeserving's house last night. But before I go on, let me just say that I know what you're going to say, and I fully agree because I've said it to you before, so you can get the tutting, heavy sighing and head-shaking thing out of the way................Done? Fine, I'll continue.

I didn't sleep over like I usually would, I just went there after work and he dropped me home later in the night. I don't know why I went - I guess it's because it was a Friday night, I had no plans and he invited me over, so I thought, "Why not?" It was cool though. We bought Chinese, watched TV, listened to music, chatted, laughed, etc. No I didn't have sex with him, but I won't lie, there was a little hanky panky.

You're probably thinking that me going there is a bit random, but we have spoken every so often, it's just that nothing significant happened for me to report about. I've also seen him at a couple of events (him being a DJ and all), and we've spoken then too. We've not been on bad terms or anything like that, I just don't chase after him like, some slack girls I see.

The thing is - I'm not in love with this guy. I like spending time with him, when need be. Yes I said 'need.' Like I said before, he's a Better Than Nothing situation which, to me, means that he'll do what he needs to do for now, and if (or possibly when) someone suitable decides to show himself, I'll move on. Simple. The good thing about a BTN is that you're in control of what you're doing. There shouldn't be deep feelings involved that would risk you getting hurt. And with Undeserving, he's done enough things to upset me, so now I just don't take him seriously, and that makes it easier for me. If I did take him seriously I would be a prized jackass, and I can happily tell you that I'm not one of those, thank you.






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