Dear Anyone,
Remember when I declared that today will be the day I get married? Yeah, so do I. Yet I'm at home alone, watching the X Factor, having just finished eating dinner for one. You've just got to love the notion of thinking positively and putting 'it' out there to the 'universe' eh?
I have no man news, I haven't been on any dates, I'm no closer to marriage. But I have made two decisions: 1) I no longer have a date I want to get married. If it ever happens, then hey. 2) I'm no longer entertaining any guy from my past. We'll be friends and friends only. None of them serve any productive purpose really. So there you go...
For now I'll live vicariously through other people's happiness. One of my close friends is getting married next year, so I'll share in that excitement as she plans the wedding. People I know (and know of) are getting hitched and having babies all over the place, so I'll just share in their happinesses too. Yes - happinesses. In the meantime I'll just continue to do Me, whoever Me is..
Which leads me on to recent thoughts I've been having. It has been eight months since I quit my job in pursuit of my chosen career, and thus far it has been pretty much a non-starter. I've been temping at the same place since March, and though I appreciate that making the money has been a great help, I refuse to get stuck there. But I'm also starting to wonder what I really want to do in life, because it feels like everything and nothing. I'd like to do a make-up course and make money as a freelance make-up artist, but I'd also like to live and work in NYC for a little while, but I'd also like to live and work in Barbados for a little while, but I'd also like to find a proper writing job, but I'd also like to be a freelance writer with jobs that allow me to travel, but I'd also like to meet a guy and settle down into family life... I don't know what I want to do and what I should work towards! I'm tired. I swear, if I met a guy with plenty of money, who I liked enough and he wanted to keep me, I probably wouldn't say no. And I've never really been that kinda chick.
Help me Anyone, what should I do??
4 comments:
Hi Wonderful
wow! there are lots of great things you'd like to do and you sound like a very creative person more than capable of making any of your preferred choices a reality.
Please forgive me if you've tried this already but someone had me do it and it really helped my focus. Imagine your life 5 years from now. Close your eyes and picture it everything. But dont just picture it, actually write from the moment you get up your perfect day . What do you see, smell, what are you wearing, as you write, the words should begin to flow as everything falls into place.
Maybe even think back to who you were as a child, what were your dreams then?
Love can come from anywhere, but when we engage in something we love, try new things we've always wanted to try, be a bit blder maybe, push past our comfort zones..I think we're more likely to find the right kind of love for us
Sorry if i've rattled on:)
But I was really able to relate to what you said!
Aww thank you, you weren't rattling at all! I am definitely going to sit down one day soon and do that exercise, because I think I really need to. It's one of those situations where you just don't know where to start. But I'll definitely try that one.
I have stopped focusing on this great love of mine that never comes and instead am focusing on my even greater love - myself. Doing all the things I want to do. Focus on you. Make a plan for what you want and a tactical plan for how it will happen...and have fun doing it.
I have been reading this blog for a while and I am only 21 and I seem to find this a really interesting read. I feel so terrible saying this, but find God and everything in your life will fall in place. No bible quotations, just three simple words "Go find God", all things will just fall into place-trust in him
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